Thursday, September 26, 2013

Why Tom Lehrer Got Out Of The Satire Business

Strictly speaking this is a post about why I haven't been blogging about politics lately but I think Tom Lehrer is a little more interesting than me, right? Anyway Lehrer who wrote The Vatican Rag and a lot of other trenchant satirical songs in the early to mid sixties, pretty much stopped around 1967. And in the early seventies he was asked why. He quipped that when Henry Kissinger received the Nobel Peace prize, it rendered political satire unnecessary.

So it has been with me and making fun of Republican talking points. I can't take this stuff farther than the Republicans already are! For example Ted Cruz. Cruz just completed a 22 hour "filibuster" (not an actual filibuster, because it didn't delay a vote and had no parliamentary purpose) in which he warned that voting for cloture on "Obamacare" {I'm putting quotes around the word because Cruz seems to have gone out of his way to avoid referring to an actual law such as the Affordable Care Act) would be a disaster for America. During the speech, he cited Green Eggs and Ham; which he described as a story about someone who simply didn't like something and refused to eat it, much like Americans simply don't like "Obamacare."

How sincere was he, this Ted Cruz fellow? For one thing, at the end of that Dr. Seuss classic, the protagonist tries Green Eggs and Ham and discovers he LOVES IT! IT'S HIS FAVORITE THING! HE'LL NEVER EAT ANYTHING ELSE! And an hour after he was done, Cruz voted for cloture, just like everyone else in the senate. Clearly he wants Obamacare AND he wants to trick you into thinking he doesn't, but he needs wiggle room for later.

Meanwhile, Larry Klayman, the attorney, has decided that the American justice system as conceived by the founding fathers is worthless and formed his own. Don't pay his retainer up front!

Last Wednesday, the great usurper, Barack Hussein Obama, after having been indicted by an Ocala, Florida citizens' grand jury, was convicted by a people's court of defrauding the American people and Floridians by proffering them with a fake birth certificate. See As readers of this column and know too well, Obama is not a natural born citizen eligible to be president of the United States, as he was not born in this country to two American citizen parents. However, to justify his fraud and his elections to the highest office in the land, and after years of inquiry, in 2011 the Obama White House posted on its website a birth certificate purporting to show him having been born in Hawaii. The problem is however, according to forensic experts, the birth certificate is altered and forged.

The day of reckoning has come. Obama, having failed to plead in response to the indictment that was served upon him, waived his right to a jury trial. Thumbing his nose at We the People, as the citizens' prosecutor, I appeared before a citizens' court judge and presented evidence from Cold Case Posse investigator Michael Zullo showing that Obama tricked voters into electing him in 2008 and 2012. As a result, the citizens' judge found him guilty on two counts of falsifying information to federal and state election officials. He was thus sentenced to the maximum prison term for these offenses of 10 years, and ordered to immediately surrender himself into the custody of the citizens of the United States and Florida.

Five years per count? And he's also guilty of... wearing a red tie! I'm a crime! I JUST WROTE THE LAW NOW! 30 YEARS!!!!

I could go on but I got work to do but I think this last one is worthwhile. You know how the CBO keeps dropping the estimated price of the Affordable Care Act (a real law) and conservatives keep saying no no, it's going to be twice as much as you're paying now? I figured out how this is happening - they're not lying. They just don't get the whole Less/More concept. Here's a tip... the lower number is LESS. The HIGHER number is more.