Plan B

Upset at the idea of giving money to black people? Devise an excuse to hold it up! In this case Congress pledged $1.2 billion for Haitians who were devastated by an earthquake. They're still buried in rubble, they're dying of cholera, they're suffering. But they're not all dead yet, so somehow we gotta stall.

Enter Oklahoma Republican Tom Coburn!

Now the authorization bill that would direct how the aid is delivered remains sidelined by a senator who anonymously pulled it for further study. Through calls to dozens of senators' offices, the AP learned it was Sen. Tom Coburn, a Republican from Oklahoma.

"He is holding the bill because it includes an unnecessary senior Haiti coordinator when we already have one" in U.S. Ambassador Kenneth Merten, Coburn spokeswoman Becky Bernhardt said.

The bill proposes a new coordinator in Washington who would not oversee U.S. aid but would work with the USAID administrator in Washington to develop a rebuilding strategy. The position would cost $1 million a year for five years, including salaries and expenses for a staff of up to seven people.

If this one doesn't hold, the next step is vetting the bill for spelling errors and margin-size analysis. Sooner or later them voodoos is gonna die off!