Hamlet Was Right

So I'm listening to Rush Limbaugh this morning (yes, for schaudenfreude) and he is completely mystified that Obama could have won both the electoral college AND the popular vote, after that disastrous first term. And I realized that it's exactly the way I felt in 2004. Mitt Romney is their John Kerry - an unappealing rich weirdo who you nominate when you think you can run ANYBODY and the results are still in the bag because the other candidate is so awful.

Turns out, not so much.

As Hamlet said, "there are more things in heaven and Earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy". Such things include independent voters, people who were neither thrilled nor disgusted by either candidate. Strange as it seems, THESE PEOPLE EXIST. I know, weird right? Anyway, there were enough of them to overcome the hoards of people who had made up their minds LAST year about which guy to vote for.

It's important to note that the victory is pretty narrow here. We shouldn't consider it a mandate. What a sensible person will see from this is everybody should compromise and listen to each other's ideas.

I'm sorry this post wasn't more snarky... check out twitter and facebook feeds for that. I'm exhausted from snarky.

Quote of the Day: Yeah! Wait NO! Edition

Ginny Lewis, a Democrat and 72-year-old retired district attorney from Princeton, Ky., says she'll vote for Romney because "I'm tired of the Republicans blaming all the debt on Democrats, so let them take over and see what they do."

CBS News

Donald Trump, Apologist For 99% of America's Red Meat

Sorry, what? Trump is up to something else today also?



I wouldn't presume to tell the President what to do, though if it were me I'd make a counter-offer: I'd release the transcripts and give a half-mil to Trumps favorite charity (Hair Club For Men?) if Romney releases 10 more years of tax returns. Then, EVERYBODY would be happy.

Quote of the Day: Romney Is No Taft Edition

“Governor Romney came in here tonight and showed he was presidential,” Florida Sen. Marco Rubio said after the debate. “The president was small. … Only Mitt Romney spoke and acted like a president.”

- Fox News

It Must Be Loud In The Fox News Offices!

If you missed the debate last night, you will want to turn to transcripts to find out what was said. The snarky folk at Wonkette noticed last night that Fox News had an unfortunate audio gap (click on the above pictures to see it more fully) which was pretty lengthy! It was about a minute and a half of audio which couldn't be transcribed.

The good news is that every other news organization in the country managed to get the response down. It went like this:

We, of course, don’t want to have automatic weapons, and that’s already illegal in this country to have automatic weapons. What I believe is we have to do, as the president mentioned towards the end of his remarks there, which is to make enormous efforts to enforce the gun laws that we have, and to change the culture of violence that we have.
And you ask how — how are we going to do that? And there are a number of things. He mentioned good schools. I totally agree. We were able to drive our schools to be number one in the nation in my state. And I believe if we do a better job in education, we’ll — we’ll give people the — the hope and opportunity they deserve and perhaps less violence from that. But let me mention another thing. And that is parents. We need moms and dads, helping to raise kids. Wherever possible the — the benefit of having two parents in the home, and that’s not always possible. A lot of great single moms, single dads. But gosh to tell our kids that before they have babies, they ought to think about getting married to someone, that’s a great idea.

Thank heavens! I mean maybe someone was cleaning their AK-47 in the newsroom and it went off. In any event, good thing for Fox News that they're not the only network! Sometimes you need the biased totally-in-the-tank-for-Obama ones to take up the slack.

Hey by the way, Mitt Romney is for gun control! Who knew, right?

Finally, A Way To Make The Empty Chair Racist

MORGAN HILL, Calif. — Some residents are calling a symbolic political display erected by a Morgan Hill homeowner that features two watermelons and a noose racist and even vaguely threatening towards President Obama.
The apparent reference to President Obama made some people passing by, including Republicans, uneasy.
"We shouldn't be threatening with a noose and a watermelon," said San Martin resident Ben Gomez. "I believe that's a little over the top. I like the chair and the teleprompter. I mean, they're just copying Clint Eastwood, so I can't blame them on that one. But the noose goes a little over the edge."

Listen Señor Gomez, you're either with us or against us. Why don't you drop the chalupa and go back to Spainland with your 30 relatives?

Look, it's not like people aren't joking about lynching Mitt Romney. I mean, somewhere they must be.

Opera Windows

In the film releasing world, "window" is a term describing the amount of time between when a movie is released in theatres and when it comes out in ancillary markets. For example, The Social Network had about a six month window before it came out on DVD and Blu-Ray, and maybe another 2 months before it was streaming for free on Netflix.

The Social Network was, of course, a huge hit and usually the studios will keep that window big on hits, to maximize their profits. As long as you keep buying tickets, they're going to keep it in the theatres.

Which brings us to this press release article on Newsmax.

A blockbuster documentary film that broke box-office records and exposed President Obama’s past is set for release as a DVD on the eve of the presidential elections.

“2016: Obama’s America” rose quickly in ticket sales to become one the most successful documentaries ever released to theaters, will now have a major second act on Oct 16.

That’s when 2016 will be released as a DVD.

At this writing 2016 is #29 on the national box office charts, but it's only been out for 13 weeks. It's made $33 million dollars (I'm not sure which records have been broken; it's neither documentaries nor political documentaries) but it's safe to say that the people behind the movie are convinced that they're out of juice at the box office. Perhaps they're counting the $300 million dollars they'll make on video? Maybe they'll make another movie depicting the flood of viewers coming to see the first one, and call it an "re-enactment".

Your Liberal Media

And those liberals almost got away with it!

We have a number of corrections tonight for a story in our 5 o’clock news. The story focused on three new ads from Senator Claire McCaskill aimed at opponent todd akin’s remarks about rape. We incorrectly said there was one ad. We mistakenly said the ads featured two women speaking out against McCaskill. The ads actually feature three women – all survivors of sexual assault – and they were speaking on behalf of McCaskill. Also, a reading error lead to a misquote of one of the women in the ad, who actually said “I’m a pro-life mother and a survivor of an extremely violent sexual assault. As a woman of faith, I must forgive Todd Akin. But as a voter, it’s not something I can forget.” And finally, the McCaskill camp objected to our use of the phrase “controversial characters” when refering to the women in the ads. We apoloigize for that characterization and the errors.

I Would Have Been Disappointed By The Debate Too

Sure I think about politics all the time, but that doesn't mean I watch the debates. Actually I would have only I had a better thing to do last night - the Cinerama Dome was hosting a screening of It's A Mad Mad Mad Mad World in its original insanely wide aspect ratio. It was on a screen so curved that it seemed to take place on the surface of Venus.

Still from what I'm hearing that Mitt Romney fellah did much, much better than that Barack Obama fellah. Not just Breitbart is saying this. The Stephanie Miller program (my morning show of choice) put forth that view. Every MSM outlet I have encountered today said it. What good is having the entire media in the tank for you if you can't get them to fudge the results of a debate? I'm telling you, when the Jews were running the media it was a lot more on message.

It's way to early to tell if there is a "debate bounce" in the offing for Romney, but will anyone really be convinced that the campaign performance of the last six months was the aberration and last night was the real Romney? In fact, is anyone convinced there IS a real Romney?

Well whatever, I'm moved to say this November may the best man win. If it turns out to be the man both sides hate, if he's the best one then let's make it work people.

Don't Be Afraid Little One

What's this country coming to where a guy can't admit that he prefers Judge Scalia while campaigning in a centrist state? The voters tried to CENSOR Scott Brown and it had a chilling effect on his free speech rights!

Reasoned Debate

I think this one falls in into the category of "argument with an empty chair".

Quote Of the Day: Attention Chick Voters Edition

"I think we have a very clear path to victory, and apparently Claire McCaskill thinks we do, too, because she was very aggressive at the debate, which was quite different than it was when she ran against Jim Talent. She had a confidence and was much more ladylike (in 2006), but in the debate on Friday she came out swinging, and I think that's because she feels threatened."

 - Rep. Todd ("Legitimate Rape") Akin, getting on the good side of female voters by reminding them to know their place and always be ladylike

The GOP HATES Free Speech!

The Virginia Republican party is violating the Right of Free Speech and CENSORING the Republicans of Mecklenberg County.

RICHMOND — Virginia Republican Party officials on Tuesday ordered their Mecklenburg County affiliate to remove photos portraying President Obama as a witch doctor, a caveman and a thug from its Facebook page.

The altered photos have been on the Mecklenburg County Republican Committee’s page for months but drew attention outside the rural southwestern enclave after a luncheon event this week with Republican Senate candidate George Allen.

“These kinds of images have no place in political discourse — period,” said Pat Mullins, chairman of the Republican Party of Virginia. “They are offensive, tasteless and should never have been posted anywhere, let alone a local unit’s Facebook page. The Republican Party of Virginia condemns this sort of imagery in the strongest possible terms. I am in the process of contacting our Mecklenburg County unit to inform them that this is unacceptable behavior from any local unit associated with our party.”

Why? Why do they call things like the pictures below unacceptable? BECAUSE THEY HATE FREEDOM.





To make matters worse, it's just the common people who are posting these pictures to Facebook, not the Mecklenburg County Party. THE VIRGINIA REPUBLICANS are trying to supress the American People! Maybe they're Muslims! I'm not saying they are, I'm not saying they aren't. I'm just saying.

Building A Mittstery

Hat tip to Sarah McLaughlin for the title; in other words, the gag only works if I explain it. And actually, still not.

A lot of people have called Mitt Romney inconsistent in his views, but that's because they simply aren't paying attention. Well I am. And here is a great example! In 2007 Mitt Romney was talking to Glenn Beck about health care and he said "When they show up at the hospital, they get care. They get free care paid for by you and me. If that’s not a form of socialism, I don’t know what is."

Wouldn't make a thing like that up! So you might think from that statement that Romney is against the emergency room system in this country. But au contraire, mon frere! Here he again, last night on 60 Minutes.

"Well, we do provide care for people who don't have insurance...If someone has a heart attack, they don't sit in their apartment and die. We pick them up in an ambulance, and take them to the hospital, and give them care. And different states have different ways of providing for that care."

Has Romney changed his mind about emergency rooms? No! What we can conclude is he is a socialiast. It seems a little odd probably that a socialist ran Bain Capital but it's not like he was a communist. He was merely exercising the model of consolidating small companies so they could be run by a large central authority.

This weekend Sarah Palin (the other great Sarah of the North) suggested it's time for Mitt and Paul Ryan to go rogue. I think she's onto him too and wants to encourage him and his French socialist views. Vive le Mitt! 

Ann Romney Tells Mitt To STOP IT.

July 29, JERUSALEM (AP) — Mitt Romney says that if he paid more taxes than were required, he wouldn't be qualified to be president.

Romney just released his 2011 taxes today! Per a statement from Romney's campaign:

Regarding the newly-filed 2011 Tax Return:

In 2011, the Romneys paid $1,935,708 in taxes on $13,696,951 in mostly investment income. 

The Romneys’ effective tax rate for 2011 was 14.1%. 

The Romneys donated $4,020,772 to charity in 2011, amounting to nearly 30% of their income.

The Romneys claimed a deduction for $2.25 million of those charitable contributions. 

The Romneys’ generous charitable donations in 2011 would have significantly reduced their tax obligation for the year. The Romneys thus limited their deduction of charitable contributions to conform to the Governor's statement in August, based upon the January estimate of income, that he paid at least 13% in income taxes in each of the last 10 years.

Virtual highlighter mine.

Let's face it, when you yourself are sniping in public at your bid for the presidency, maybe it's time to just endorse Obama. Republicans hate Romney so much now, it would probably help.

Don't Mention It

How do you run for office in the state that Mitt Romney governed? For God's sake, avoid reminding people about him.

 

As a matter of fact, maybe this would work on the national level!

Don't Be Alarmed!

He is only this dark when he appears on Univision.

Rubber 'n' Glue Department

Oh yeah? I'll tell you who doesn't pay taxes! ANY OF THE PEOPLE WHO VOTE FOR OBAMA! 

If you voted for Obama in 2008 and have paid any taxes since, perhaps you want to drop a note to Romney. Or the RNC. Or anybody who runs a talk show on radio.

 

Can You Spot The Error?

Fox and Friends, yesterday morning.



Fox and Friends, this morning.


Can you spot the error?

The error is Fox and Friends ISSUED A RETRACTION! What's wrong with those guys? Usually they know that unemployment figures, like the definition of "socialism", is entirely a matter of opinion! They need to retract the retraction, and grill an empty chair about those terrible numbers!

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