Why Tom Lehrer Got Out Of The Satire Business

Strictly speaking this is a post about why I haven't been blogging about politics lately but I think Tom Lehrer is a little more interesting than me, right? Anyway Lehrer who wrote The Vatican Rag and a lot of other trenchant satirical songs in the early to mid sixties, pretty much stopped around 1967. And in the early seventies he was asked why. He quipped that when Henry Kissinger received the Nobel Peace prize, it rendered political satire unnecessary.

So it has been with me and making fun of Republican talking points. I can't take this stuff farther than the Republicans already are! For example Ted Cruz. Cruz just completed a 22 hour "filibuster" (not an actual filibuster, because it didn't delay a vote and had no parliamentary purpose) in which he warned that voting for cloture on "Obamacare" {I'm putting quotes around the word because Cruz seems to have gone out of his way to avoid referring to an actual law such as the Affordable Care Act) would be a disaster for America. During the speech, he cited Green Eggs and Ham; which he described as a story about someone who simply didn't like something and refused to eat it, much like Americans simply don't like "Obamacare."

How sincere was he, this Ted Cruz fellow? For one thing, at the end of that Dr. Seuss classic, the protagonist tries Green Eggs and Ham and discovers he LOVES IT! IT'S HIS FAVORITE THING! HE'LL NEVER EAT ANYTHING ELSE! And an hour after he was done, Cruz voted for cloture, just like everyone else in the senate. Clearly he wants Obamacare AND he wants to trick you into thinking he doesn't, but he needs wiggle room for later.

Meanwhile, Larry Klayman, the attorney, has decided that the American justice system as conceived by the founding fathers is worthless and formed his own. Don't pay his retainer up front!

Last Wednesday, the great usurper, Barack Hussein Obama, after having been indicted by an Ocala, Florida citizens' grand jury, was convicted by a people's court of defrauding the American people and Floridians by proffering them with a fake birth certificate. See www.citizensgrandjury.com. As readers of this column and www.wnd.com know too well, Obama is not a natural born citizen eligible to be president of the United States, as he was not born in this country to two American citizen parents. However, to justify his fraud and his elections to the highest office in the land, and after years of inquiry, in 2011 the Obama White House posted on its website a birth certificate purporting to show him having been born in Hawaii. The problem is however, according to forensic experts, the birth certificate is altered and forged.

The day of reckoning has come. Obama, having failed to plead in response to the indictment that was served upon him, waived his right to a jury trial. Thumbing his nose at We the People, as the citizens' prosecutor, I appeared before a citizens' court judge and presented evidence from Cold Case Posse investigator Michael Zullo showing that Obama tricked voters into electing him in 2008 and 2012. As a result, the citizens' judge found him guilty on two counts of falsifying information to federal and state election officials. He was thus sentenced to the maximum prison term for these offenses of 10 years, and ordered to immediately surrender himself into the custody of the citizens of the United States and Florida.

Five years per count? And he's also guilty of... wearing a red tie! I'm a crime! I JUST WROTE THE LAW NOW! 30 YEARS!!!!

I could go on but I got work to do but I think this last one is worthwhile. You know how the CBO keeps dropping the estimated price of the Affordable Care Act (a real law) and conservatives keep saying no no, it's going to be twice as much as you're paying now? I figured out how this is happening - they're not lying. They just don't get the whole Less/More concept. Here's a tip... the lower number is LESS. The HIGHER number is more.

A Reminder To People Who Insist They're Not Being Racist

This guy insists he's not being racist.

David Marsters, a conservative candidate for a town position in Sabattus, Maine, was surprised by a visit from the Secret Service after he posted an article on his Facebook about President Obama along with the words “Shoot the ni**er.” But even after the Secret Service visit, Marsters continues to defend his comment as freedom of speech — although he deleted the original posting.

“[They] didn’t see no pictures of Obama with bullet holes in his head,” Marsters said. “It’s not a threatening statement, in my opinion. People take it out of context as a threat.” Marsters maintains his comment isn’t racist, because “white people are ni**ers, too.” In addition to subscribing to the conspiracy that Obama faked his birth certificate, Marsters has pushed for a town law to require a gun in every house.

So you're in that company. Just sayin'.

Analogies Are Trouble Part 1

Obamacare is just like the Iraq War!

HOW DARE THE GOVERNMENT SPEND GOVERNMENT MONEY TO PROMOTE A LAW PASSED BY THE GOVERNMENT! They're ENCOURAGING people to sign up for INSURANCE! I haven't been so outraged since Michelle Obama promoted healthy eating!

Locking Horns With Harry Shearer

I wish all my online arguments were like this. And I LOST this one!

https://twitter.com/theharryshearer/status/370232646959251456

1. Harry Shearer ‏@theharryshearer54m

   Nuremberg lesson: don't leave your conscience at door when you enlist in military. Manning lesson: do.

   Details
2. Daniel Krause ‏@piker6235m

   @theharryshearer Morality would dictate editing before releasing.

   Details
3. Harry Shearer ‏@theharryshearer33m

   @piker62 What the military calls "collateral damage", no?

   Details
4. Daniel Krause ‏@piker6230m

   @theharryshearer If you're a whistle blower, you need to be better than the organization you're blowing on.

   Details
5. Harry Shearer ‏@theharryshearer29m

   @piker62 Okay, I'll bite: how many innocent civilians did Bradley Manning kill?

   Details
6. Daniel Krause ‏@piker6227m

   @theharryshearer That information is classified, sadly. Some informants were compromised though.

   Details
7. Harry Shearer ‏@theharryshearer23m

   @piker62 Fraid not. If you're going to raise the "better than the organization" argument, reports of damage can't just be taken on trust.

   Details
8. Daniel Krause ‏@piker6215m

   @theharryshearer Fair enough. And we both probably agree that the sentence is way too severe.

   Details

 

Harry ShearerVerified account‏@theharryshearer

@piker62 Indeed.

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Republicans Backing Socialist For President

Several years back I was arguing online with one of my esteemed 'bagger friends about the border fence. They said we'd need it because it would stop terrorists from crossing over from Mexico. "It will be expensive," I insisted, "because don't forget we'll also need one all along the Canadian Border."  Oddly, they didn't believe such a thing could happen. It's almost as if they define "terrorist" as "person browner than us". And no one is whiter than Canadians, even the brown ones.

Anyway, they should have listened, because a Canadian has somehow infiltrated the senate.

Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) announced late Monday that he will renounce his Canadian citizenship, less than a day after The Dallas Morning News noted that the senator, who was born in Canada to an American mother, is likely a dual citizen.

“Now, The Dallas Morning News says that I may technically have dual citizenship,” Cruz said in a statement. “Assuming that is true, then sure, I will renounce any Canadian citizenship. Nothing against Canada, but I’m an American by birth and as a U.S. senator; I believe I should be only an American.”

I can see it now - the first thing he'd do as president is get us some of that good single-payer Canadian healthcare! And cheap pharmaceuticals! Next, French lessons for everyone.

Still at least he's not one of those Latinos trying to take jobs from Americans. 

Find the Villain

Interesting tech story caught my eye this morning:

A hacker was able to shout abuse at a two-year-old child by exploiting a vulnerability in a camera advertised as an ideal "baby monitor".

ABC News revealed how a couple in Houston, Texas, heard a voice saying lewd comments coming from the camera, made by manufacturer Foscam.

Vulnerabilities in Foscam products were exposed in April, and the company issued an emergency fix.

Foscam said it was unable to provide a statement at this time.

However, a UK-based reseller told the BBC it would contact its entire customer database to remind them "the importance in setting a password to their cameras".

The spokesman added that it would be urging Foscam's head office - based in Shenzhen, China - to send out a memo to all its resellers suggesting they too contact their customers.

ABC reported that Marc Gilbert and wife Lauren were left shaken when they heard a "British or European accent" coming from the camera.

Mr Gilbert said the voice directed offensive, sexualised words at their daughter Allyson, who was asleep in bed.

The family believed the hacker was able to call the child by her name because it was spelt out on the bedroom's wall.

The two-year-old is deaf, something the couple described as "something of a blessing" in the circumstances.

This is as bad a privacy breach as I can imagine - people all over the world having access to watch your child AND BULLY HER without your consent. And the people who are terrified because the government has access to your secrets aren't going to angrily protest Foscam, or demand that the head of Foscam be impeached. They won't even boycott Foscam.

The crowd that's enraged about the NSA surveillance program don't seem concerned that the information they're mining all comes from private corporations, who could just as easily be targeting you for elimination or social turmoil. In fact, the only reason Edward Snowden is in Russia right now is because the government farmed out all this data to ANOTHER private company, which didn't have the good sense to keep it away from him.

It increasingly looks to me like Government and Corporations both know too much about us. But at least the Government isn't a bunch of amateurs about it. The government has never let my credit card information fall into the hands of thieves, the way Exxon/Mobil did once. The government just wants to keep tabs and lock my information down. Google and Facebook... God only knows. If there's money in it, they'll sell me to Al Quaeda.

Rick Santorum, Marxist

Exhibit A:

"Santorum Hopes To Rebuild Middle Class" courtesy his website.

Exhibit B:

Santorum in Iowa, yesterday



This is no fringe player, either. For a while he was the FRONT-RUNNER in the race for a Republican presidential candidate. It's only a matter of time before he starts demanding abortions and Sharia law!

A Little Something You Hadn't Considered, Immigration Wise

...It will bring about the biblical end times!

No seriously. Don't believe me, believe former Texas Republican Party Head Cathie Adams.

Wiles: Do you know where they're taking us with this? Because they said the solution to all these lost foreigners in the country, the solution is biometric scanning. That's where they're taking us Cathy.
Adams: I do understand that. I've seen it. I've heard it. And, of course, we know in biblical prophecy that that is the End Times. That is going to be the brand either on our foreheads or on the back of our hands. That is demonic through and through. That is End Times prophecy. There is no question about that.
But, you know, another group of people that are coming into our country as refugees are others that are mostly from Moozlum, Hindu, and Buddhist cultures. There are people who are not here because they love America but because they are fleeing countries, and yet, what kind of culture are they bringing here? They want sharia law, just like what they left that was causing them to be persecuted.

I'd call her nuts but as she says, there's no question about that. 

It's odd that all these people are fleeing Buddhist and Hindo countries to escape sharia law, yet they want to install it here because there wasn't any.. oh never mind. Why deconstruct this one? Like all comedy it's funnier if you don't analyze.

When Politics Hits Too Close To Home

You know where I live? Woodland Hills. You know who was visiting last night? President Obama.

I think he's swell, is doing an incredible job considering that his opposition sabotages him and brags about it, but that's different than liking the apparatus that had to go around with him. As long as he's an abstract concept that symbolizes a force for good, more power to him. But once he and the entourage are clogging up the roads just five miles from me, that's when I get annoyed.

Not in MY backyard!

Having said that, I had absolutely no reason to leave the house last night, so the visit didn't directly effect me at all. But I got phone calls from my financial advisor complaining about how difficult it was to get into her office, so there's that.  Go away, presidential apparatus, and leave us common folk alone!

I wonder if it it does any good, putting a hashtag in a blog? #firstworldproblems

"Life" Imitates "Art"

It's an old trick on sitcoms: find your main character's least appealing trait and introduce a character who has it ten times worse. Maxwell Smart is dumb? Maybe, but he's not Larrabee dumb! Jack Tripper is a lothario? Not like Larry Manetti!

With that in mind, consider Sydney Leathers. A google image search of her reveals dozens of bikini shots and selfies -- she just made a PORN VIDEO for heaven's sake. It's interesting, no? It makes me wonder if Anthony Weiner is behind the leak, and even maybe hired her with a mind toward betting back into politics down the line. If so, I have a much greater respect for the whole team now.

But still, for God's sake, drop out of the race Carlos.

Well It's Worth a Shot

But forgive me if I don't root for you.

The attorney for San Diego Mayor Bob Filner said in a letter the city may be liable for damages in a sexual harassment lawsuit because Filner never received mandated training about such behavior.

"The city has a legal obligation to provide sexual harassment training to all management level employees," wrote attorney Harvey Berger in a letter requesting the city pay Filner's legal bills in defense of the lawsuit filed by his former communications director

It's distressing how the trend lately is toward Democrat sex scandals, though I guess power breeds contempt no matter the party. You'd think just running a city is thrill enough! For my fans (air quotes around the word fans) I am explicitly stating that Filner is a Democrat, and not a Republican. REPEAT Filner is a Democrat and not a Republican. While I'm at it, Anthony Weiner, currently running for Mayor of New York, is also a Democrat. And I apolgize to the wraith of Andrew Breitbart for thinking he was wrong when he broke the story.

Low-Hanging Fruit Friday: A Comment Section At NRO

This week I have spent a little time at The National Review Online, a conservative-leaning website that springs from a venerable magazine founded by William F. Buckley Jr. and to tell the truth, it kind of needs him nowadays. Which is sad because he ain't coming back even more than Reagan isn't.

Anyway, a Mr. Lamar Smith published a helpful analysis today called "GOP Should Face Facts on Immigration Reform (subtitled, Republicans will benefit by working to make more Hispanics middle class) and I think his point is rather than concentrate on legalizing those who aren't citizens, the GOP should be treating the legal Hispanics better. A sensible counter-strategy, especially if you're opposed to illegal immigration on the grounds that it's simply illegal.

The impression I'm getting from the comments section is that is not the grounds that his readers are using. *

heisenberg2011 • 37 minutes ago − The GOP is "White in race only" or WIROs. They may be White people, but they don't serve the interests of White people (except for the economic interests of the top 1% of White people). On the issue of White genocide they are silent.The program of White genocide is being carried out by sending in millions of non-Whites into White countries and force assimilating (I.e. intermarriage and amalgamation) these non-Whites into all White communities and institutions. This is genocide by forced assimilation. The GOP is just as guilty of this crime as the Democrats.

Mark Probst • 36 minutes ago − yep... the Repuuubss need to pander to criminals, and the uneducated just like the DeeMOcraps. AKA- cant beat em' join em.

Hercules Loadmaster • 9 hours ago − The Mexican middle class. Do you know how they get to be middle class? They pull serious fraud through government programs, extensively cheat on taxes (claim nieces, nephews and probably their dog and cat for the children tax breaks), steal things, such as live chickens and who knows what else. Some of you that think we need to embrace these low lifes should move to rural areas and get more acquainted with the facts.

Mark Lang • 12 hours ago I hate you (author). You and your surrender to the Balkanization of the US electorate make me sick to my stomach.

*Full disclosure - obviously I have picked and chosen here - these are the most racist responses. Many are are reasonable as the article itself. And if that's your idea of entertainment, be my guest, read them. Links up there.

Godwin's Law Holds!

A week ago I wrote about the theory of "no pregnancy coming from legitimate rape" coming from Nazi scientists. I'm happy to report that I was wrong! Kind of. At least, apparently, the Nazis never conducted the experiment.

As controversial as the subject of abortion is, irrespective of one’s personal opinion, it is important that the evidence supporting an assertion that rape inhibits pregnancy be based on credible evidence. Such evidence does not exist.
The controversial nature of claims about rape and pregnancy are further exacerbated by their supposed reference to research on victims of Nazi terror. The medical crimes of the Hitler period were so horrendous that it is difficult to imagine what they might not have done. Indeed, given what is known about medical practices in Nazi Germany, research on rape and pregnancy is plausible. However, there is no evidence to suggest that it actually happened.

So not only is the theory from Nazis, but even the Nazis never verified it. I regret the innacuracy.

Rough Choice: Who To Hate In The Weiner Scenario?

Well... me personally I'd go with the husband, who is cheating and sexting other women and appears to be so self-involved that he doesn't think it should be considered a problem. But if you're with a party that maybe already has a problem with women, maybe the wife?

...it is amazing, as we speculate about Ms. Abedin’s political future, that the elephant in the room goes unnoticed, or at least studiously unmentioned.
Sorry to interrupt the Best Enabler of a Sociopath Award ceremony but, to recap, Ms. Abedin worked for many years at a journal that promotes Islamic-supremacist ideology that was founded by a top al-Qaeda financier, Abdullah Omar Naseef. Naseef ran the Rabita Trust, a formally designated foreign terrorist organization under American law. Ms. Abedin and Naseef overlapped at the Journal of Muslim Minority Affairs (JMMA) for at least seven years. Throughout that time (1996–2003), Ms. Abdein worked for Hillary Clinton in various capacities.

The piece is written by Andrew C. McCarthy. I'm not sure if it's the same Andrew McCarthy who was in Weekend At Bernie's (spoiler: no, of course it isn't) but that voice drives me up the wall.

Extra kick-em-when-they're-down credit for the humiliating title, The Huma Unmentionables. That'll teach those chicks to step outta line!

Throwback Thursday: Coupla Followups

About a week and a half ago I expressed a skepticism about the George Zimmerman verdict, which occasioned an angry series of responses from favorite nemesis WAMK. He pointed out that as someone who hadn't watched the whole trial, I... I don't know, shouldn't have an opinion about it? Have one but keep it to myself? Who knows? All I know is, judging by the language, he's very, very angry at me. 

I gotta say though, you know who else was skeptical about Zimmerman's innocence? At least half the jury. In our justice system the accused is innocent unless proven guilty, and the jury did the right thing because they felt there wasn't enough hard evidence to convict. But like me, Juror B29 doesn't think Zimmerman is innocent. Unlike me, she DID watch gavel-to-gavel coverage.

Regarding yesterday's recounting of Rep. Steve King's belief that most illegal immigrants are drug mules, I have an ally. To paraphrase Weird Al Yankovic, even John Boehner knows it's wrong.

Boehner already had issued a written statement earlier in the week condemning King's remarks, but at his weekly news conference, he ramped up his criticism even without being asked. The Ohio Republican took the unusual step of calling King out by name, dramatizing the concern among GOP leaders that incendiary comments from the right can tarnish the party's image even as lawmakers struggle to find a solution to the immigration debate.
"I want to be clear. There's no place in this debate for hateful or ignorant comments from elected officials," Boehner said.

I'd only take issue with Boehner's quoted remark: he clearly hasn't been paying enough attention to "this debate".  There doesn't seem to be room for much else!

Pull Out! PULL OUT!

Anthony Weiner, Democrat, is running for Mayor of New York. You might not remember who is is... oh wait, he's THIS GUY.

The serious question he stirs up, and there is only one, is should we be judging our politicians by their sex lives? Or even their private lives in general - what their religions are, or whether they ever shoplifted or toked up in college, etc.? I'm of the camp that says no, politicians should be judged by whether they use the office make the lives of their constituents better. We should vote accordingly.

However, Weiner needs to drop out of the race, because we DON'T VOTE THAT WAY. Anybody in politics nowadays knows that your personal life is, in fact, fodder for a fine-tooth-comb go-over. If you have something this distasteful in your personal make-up, turning a blind eye to it is like thinking you can be a piano virtuoso even though you lost both your arms in the war. It suggests a detachment from reality that must be bleeding over into your policy decisions. Maybe the private sector has a job for Weiner, but I sure wish he'd withdraw his application for Mayor.

99 Percent of Immigrants Are Drug Mules!

Who knew? Rep. Steve King of Iowa knew!



Rep. King is gracious enough to admit that some Mexicans are valedictorians and not drug mules.

I'm wondering how that works economically - the cartels hire these guys and say, here's some money to haul this backpack full of drugs over the border. Once you get there, you can stay and apply for citizenship; I'll hire another guy and send him over after you. Seems a little counter-productive, this operation. Why not use the same mules again? And why would a guy who's struggling to get to the US take the risk of carrying all those drugs as well, when it would attract drug-sniffing dogs?

And of course, considering how fat and lazy those guys are it seems incredible that so many of them have calves the size of cantaloupes. Another research project for another time.

The RNC and I Agree On Something!

RETWEET if you are tired of more @BarackObama speeches and no progress! #SpeechesDontHire
— RNC (@GOP) July 22, 2013

I demand progress! Unfortunately, not everyone agrees with me.

BOB SCHIEFFER: Any way you cut it, and whoever's fault it is, you have presided over what it perhaps the least-productive and certainly one of the least popular congresses in history. How do you feel about that? 

SPEAKER JOHN BOEHNER: Well, Bob, we should not be judged on how many new laws we create. We ought to be judged on how many laws that we repeal.

--  Face The Nation, July 21

The RNC oughtta have a word with that guy. And by the way, judging them on how many laws they repeal...

Bills the House Has Repealed So Far This Year:

May 22: the House agreed to an Amendment that would repeal or reduce the estate tax, but only if done in a fiscally responsible way.

June 20: the House voted to repeal an amendment that would establish the National Sheep Industry Improvement Center.

Bills the House Has Tried to Repeal So Far This Year, and Failed at Repealing:

March 22: the House failed to establish a deficit-neutral reserve fund to permanently eliminate the Federal estate tax

May 22: the House rejected an amendment HR 1947, which was an attempt to repeal the nutrition entitlement programs and establish a nutrition assistance block grant program.

June 19: the House rejected an amendment to HR 1947, which was attempt to repeal Section 3102, which reauthorizes the Market Access Program (MAP) until 2018

June 19: the House failed to repeal a permanent law from the Agriculture Act of 1949 that pertains to dairy support.

June 20: the House failed to repeal the Biodiesel Fuel Education Program which awards federal grants to educate fleet operators and the public on the benefits of using biodiesel fuels, instead of fossil fuels.

And of course, the House has tried and failed to repeal Obamacare six different times.

So, the Congress is a failure, right?

A Counter-Counter Point

WAMK responds here. I still disagree with him about the idea that Martin was the only aggressor in the scenario as described in court, but I'm not going back there to say so. It's like walking into a biker bar and screaming HELL'S ANGELS SUCK!  The Hell's Angels, frankly, aren't open to reasoned debate on that topic.

Let's add this also... I'm supposed to accept the jury's verdict, apparently, and move on. After all, Zimmerman's story was consistant and Zimmerman had his day in court and was found not guilty. That's a reasonable position to take, as long as you say the same thing about O.J. Simpson's murder trial. Me, I'm still troubled by that one too.

A Rebuttal, From Someone Who KNOWS THE FACTS **Update**

I'm going to admit here that it is seriously gratifying to learn that WAMK reads this blog, at least once in a while. He cranked out a rebuttal to the piece I wrote Monday about the George Zimmerman  verdict. I won't go over there to respond to it because it would be a discourtesy to disagree with him on his own blog (and twitter feed) so instead I'll just admit here that he's right on many counts.

My source now is this Yahoo explainer,  which includes the transcript of Zimmerman's 911 call. It's true the police did not insist that Zimmerman stop following the kid; they merely said "you don't have to do that". Obviously Zimmerman could have avoided his alleged beating had he listened, and therefore the subsequent incarceration and trial.

It's the attitude expressed below by WAMK, though I've heard it from many others as well, that still troubles me:

Martin had several choices that night. Martin could have continued on his way home. Martin could have called police, and reported a "creepy ass cracker" following him. He could have hid in the shadows until Zimmerman went away. He could have yelled from the shadows "Stop following me, I've called the police". He could have banged on a door or two, yelling for help that he was scared. He could have told the girl he was on the phone with to call the cops for him while he hid. But he didn't. He made a choice to confront Zimmerman, a choice that ultimately cost him his life.

In other words Martin would be alive today if he had simply NOT CHOSEN TO STAND HIS GROUND. There's a double standard at work here. It's true that Trayvon Martin had a violent incident in his past - but so did Zimmerman. Martin had some racially charged statements in his internet history - so did Zimmerman. So why is Zimmerman a hero and Martin a troublemaker? Remember, there was no evidence that Martin was in the neighborhood to commit a crime. He didn't have tools. He wasn't even armed.

Since we only have Zimmerman's side of the story now, the testimony of a man who had a murder rap to beat, the trial really doesn't prove anything. And until someone can explain why people who were convinced of Zimmerman's innocence from day one got that idea, people like me will suspect that race is the motivating factor.

In WAMK's favor, I recollect that he was not convinced from day one. You know who was though? The Florida justice system, who didn't even consider the case worthy of a hearing until the bad publicity forced their hand.

Update ** Glad you WAMK guys found food for thought in all this!**