Look Under A Rock For Him

Speaking of Newt, here's a handy table of positions he's taken in the last few years which suggest that he's actually okay with all the of the parts of "Obamacare" that he calls socialism.

	Newt Gingrich	Affordable Care Act
Individual Mandate	“You ought to either have health insurance, or you ought to post a bond.” [Healthcare Cease Fire, 2005]	Section 1501: U.S. citizens and legal residents who don’t obtain coverage by 2014, pay a tax penalty.
Group Purchasing	“Large risk pools…should be established so low income people can buy insurance as inexpensively as large corporations.” [Winning The Future, 2005]	Section 1321: States establish health insurance exchanges to allow individuals, families, and small businesses to harness the purchasing power of large employers.
Subsidies	“Some aspect of the working poor has to involve transfer of finances. To ask people in the lowest paying jobs to bear the full burden of their health insurance is just irrational.” [Healthcare Cease Fire, 2005]	Section 1401: Families with incomes between 133-400% of the federal poverty line will receive premium credits to purchase insurance through the Exchanges.
Comparative Effectiveness Research	“A health care system that is driven by robust comparative clinical evidence will save lives and money.” [NYT, 2008]	Section 6302: Establishes a non-profit Patient-Centered Outcomes Research Institute to identify research priorities andconduct research that compares the clinical effectiveness of medical treatments.
Improving Quality	“Don Berwick at the Institute for Healthcare Improvement has worked for years to spread the word that the same systematic approach to quality control that has worked so well in manufacturing could create a dramatically safer, less expensive and more effective system of health and health care.” [Washington Post, 2000]	TITLE X: Improves health care quality through numerous provisions, including the innovation of payment reform models and rewarding providers who deliver quality care.
Prevention	“The 21st Century System of Health and Healthcare willpartner with you first to prevent illness and then to care for you as a patient if you become ill.” [Saving Lives & Saving Money, 2006]	TITLE IV: Prevention services will be available without additional cost-sharing and the law establishes a Prevention and Public Health Fund.
Health Information Technology (HIT)	“Going to a paperless all-electronic system is going to save lives, it’s going to save money, it’s going to lead to better outcomes, it’s going to give us new opportunities.” [Paper Kills, 2007]	The stimulus act invested in HIT and the ACA requires the government to develop standards “that facilitate electronic enrollment of individuals in Federal and State health and human services programs.”
Fraud	“First, we must dramatically reduce healthcare fraud within our current healthcare system.” [Stop Paying The Crooks, 2009]	The federal government has “more than tripled the amount of money it has recovered” in the past six years form fraud and the ACA includes numerous anti-fraud provisions from increasing the federal sentencing guidelines for health care fraud to appropriating an additional $350 million over 10 years to ramp up anti-fraud efforts.

Roger Ailes Must Prefer Newt

Check it out... FoxNews commits a breach of etiquette and talks about Mitt Romney once he's left the room.

If he insists on staying in the race, they'll just start running a crawl under him with a "D" after his name.

Do Your Homework!

The current crop of Republican candidates seem to share the same common flaw: they don't seem interested in learning the basics of the job. Whether it's foreign policy, American history, or their own history, they just don't seem willing to hit the books before they start talking.  However, up until now, most of them seemed at least to understand voting itself. 


Rick Perry, the man who won't even learn his own talking points, spoke today at New Hampshire Institute of Politics.

At the end of his stump speech at a town hall meeting, Perry said, “Those of you that will be 21 by November the 12th, I ask for your support and your vote. Those of you who won’t be, work hard.”

As the Boston Globe points out, "the legal voting age is 18, not 21. The date of the 2012 general election is Nov. 6."

Perry is currently polling 4th out of 8 candidates. Herman Cain is next in line. HERMAN CAIN.

People In America Lean Center-Right; Corporations Are People

Polls are one thing, but here's America voting with its dollars. And money talks.

Democratic leaders raising money to be spent on the most competitive House races in next year’s elections are doing something remarkable: outraising their Republican counterparts, despite a historic drubbing a year ago that left Democrats in the minority.

House Democrats have raised $52.1 million to the Republicans’ $48.7 million. The difference is small, but it’s significant given that no minority party has been able to get such an edge in fundraising since the 1994 election cycle.

What makes the Democratic surge in fundraising so unusual is that political money tends to flow to those in power and those with momentum. In the fall of 2007, for example, a year after Republicans were kicked out of their 12-year reign in the majority, the NRCC had a negative cash balance and had raised just $40.7 million — a roughly 30 percent drop from two years earlier. Not even a year into their new power, the DCCC had pulled in nearly $57 million and had a cash balance over $27 million by the end of October 2007.

Republicans are courting the Corporation vote, and they're going to get it. The thing that they seem to keep forgetting is that it's only one vote, one person. And there are more real people than corporations. I mean, like a lot more. Seriously, look in your phone book some time. Even in the yellow pages, the corporations are outnumbered.

Loving America By Dismantling Her Proud Traditions

What's for dinner tomorrow? Turkey? TERRORIST!

In a little-known strike against freedom, yet again, we are being forced into consuming meat slaughtered by means of a torturous method: Islamic slaughter.

Halal slaughter involves cutting the trachea, the esophagus, and the jugular vein, and letting the blood drain out while saying "Bismillah allahu akbar" -- in the name of Allah the greatest. Many people refuse to eat it on religious grounds. Many Christians, Hindus or Sikhs and Jews find it offensive to eat meat slaughtered according to Islamic ritual (although observant Jews are less likely to be exposed to such meat, because they eat kosher).

...Non-Muslims in America and Europe don't deserve to have halal turkey forced upon them in this way, without their knowledge or consent. So this Thanksgiving, fight for your freedom. Find a non-halal, non-Butterball turkey to celebrate Thanksgiving this Thursday. And write to Butterball and request, politely but firmly, that they stop selling only halal turkeys, and make non-halal turkeys available to Americans who still value our freedoms.

OMG, they're everywhere! Grow your own turkeys! And vegetables! Don't drink from public fountains! I have a friend whose friend ate some halal jerky and they totally started worshipping Allah.

I went to a number of Thanksgiving dinners where they said grace right in the room with me, and yet I'm still Atheist. Still, if she wants to open up a market for, let's say, ethnically pure turkeys with some kind of premium put on them, I suppose it won't be bad for business.

Congress Loves America, America Loves Congress

Oh, Is THAT Happening Too?

You may recall that a "super-committee" of congress was charged with finding a way to balance the budget, probably as a way to not tie up ALL of Congress so they could go on with the important business of not accomplishing other things. Well, the SC has announced that they are done with their job of not accomplishing their task.

Who is to blame?

The surest sign of who the American people will blame is this: look at the front page of the Fox News website right now. Click to read full size.

What is most noticeable is the complete absence of stories about the super-committee. Maybe they covered it yesterday, but the rest of the lamestream media seems to think that it's somehow more important than our friends in the rust belt, or Jimmy Fallon's mean joke on Michele Bachmann. Which she no doubt wouldn't have gotten anyway.

And meanwhile, also from FoxNews this afternoon:

I don't think they're gonna be able to pin this one on him.

Another Republican Job Plan

Though he's not the first Republican to suggest this, Newt Gingrich got a little attention this week over his idea to America's unemployed - fire adults and replace them with their kids.

"Core policies of protecting unionization and bureaucratization against children in the poorest neighborhoods, crippling them by putting them in schools that fail has done more to create income inequality in the United States than any other single policy. It is tragic what we do in the poorest neighborhoods, entrapping children in, first of all, child laws, which are truly stupid.

"You say to somebody, you shouldn't go to work before you're what, 14, 16 years of age, fine. You're totally poor. You're in a school that is failing with a teacher that is failing. I've tried for years to have a very simple model. Most of these schools ought to get rid of the unionized janitors, have one master janitor and pay local students to take care of the school. The kids would actually do work, they would have cash, they would have pride in the schools, they'd begin the process of rising."

THAT'S the way to solve a bunch of problems at once! Inner city kids aren't learning? Make them take a night job to support their parents! Plus, the idea of the government running the child labor racket instead of say, American Apparel, should take all the stigma out of that situation.

And the best part of it is, it's relatively inexpensive to pay your workforce in gruel.

More Jobs Bills From The Party Of Jobs Creators

Who stands with Walker?

...Then Walker called a special jobs-focused session of the Legislature, which he dubbed "Back to Work Wisconsin," to pass even more "job-creating" laws. At the top of the jobs agenda? Gutting the state's sex ed standards and replacing them with abstinence-only education.

A bill launched during Walker's jobs session and nearing passage in the Legislature would repeal significant portions of the state law that requires schools to provide comprehensive, scientifically accurate, and age-appropriate sex ed.

Okay, maybe the whole jobs thing was covered in there somewhere, though as the article points out, unemployment is rising in Wisconsin since Walker took office.

Anyway, the important thing is the federal level. What are they up to in Congress to put people back to work?

The House on Wednesday evening approved a controversial bill that would require all states to honor the concealed weapons permits of other states, on the strength of Republican support for the idea that different state standards should not interfere with American's Second Amendment rights.

The bill, H.R. 822, passed in a 272-154 vote in which more than 40 Democrats supported it along with all but about a half dozen Republicans.

The debate and vote in many ways pitted the Second Amendment to the Constitution, the right to bear arms, against the 10th Amendment, which aims to ensure that states retain rights not expressly given to the federal government. Republicans are frequent champions of state rights, but today argued that the Second Amendment must prevail over varying state rules related to gun permits.

That actually does potentially raise employment. It's kind of ironic - it's a republican bill that trashes state's rights, and it will boost government employment of union members, in this case police. Still, nice to know they're out there fighting for what they believe in.

Rattle Rattle Rattle

More rat-in-a-box news:

In a soon-to-be published memoir, GOP candidate Rep. Michele Bachmann accuses former President George W. Bush of “socialism” for his 2007 decision to bail out financial institutions teetering on collapse, according to reports.

“The Bush administration, which had always professed faith in the free-market system, was now reversing its course,” Bachmann writes in “Core of Conviction,” a memoir to be released Nov. 21, according to Fox News, which obtained a copy.

Though Bachmann doesn't name Herman Cain or Sarah Palin, they are also socialists because at the time they publicly supported the bailout. Socialists. Like the French.

The good news for the Republicans is that not long after November 21st, Michele Bachman will drop out of the race, citing a wish to spend more time with her family.

Quote of the Day

"Who gave you the right to occupy America?"

-Karl Rove

They Better At Least Cut Some Holes In That Thing

A guy I used to know was very fond of citing a research study on rats to illustrate human behavior. In the study, some rats were put in a box.When the box was at rest, the rats coexisted peacefully, respecting each other's space and only competing when food was introduced. But when scientists shook the box, the rats would turn on each other, biting and attacking each other. Unable to get the guy shaking the box, they struck out at each other.

The Republican party is a box nowadays, sitting on one of those paint mixer machines at Loewe's.

It has gotten so bad, they're starting to go after Grover Norquist.

In the past, I have spent some time explaining that Norquist represents the gravitational center of an effort at Muslim Brotherhood infiltration of the conservative movement and politics in America more generally – especially Republican politics.

Slowly but surely, more conservatives and Republicans are coming to that recognition. It's a slow train only because so few with a soapbox are willing and able to explain it. Norquist has spent a lifetime building coalitions, raising money and growing power and influence.

I understand Newt Gingrich is enjoying a renaissance as a serious candidate for President. If he's smart he'll get out before the real biting begins.

Sarah Didn't Move Quick Enough

She should have un-quit yesterday while the void was still open; now it looks like the tea-party sentiment is moving towards career politician, lobbyist, campaign-finance fraudster and serial adulterer Newt Gingrch. Gingrich/Cain 2011! Or Cain/Gingrich! Whichever optics work better!

I think most Republicans would agree that this is a terrible choice, and they'd hate to see them running the country, and they'd never want either of these guys as president in a million years. And at least they'd be better than that Obummer guy.

Analogy Of The Day

In my continuing quest to understand what conservatives really think, I spent a little time today perusing biggovernment.com. Yes, it's true that I was actually there for a little schadenfreude over Rick Perry's debate performance last night and further exhortations for Sarah Palin to change her mind AGAIN and run for President after all.  But I found an interesting analogy instead.

This fellah, Lawrence Meyers, finds similarities between the #occupy movement and a protest he participated in in college.

Back in 1985, when I was attending Cornell University, the movement du jour was encouraging universities to divest from companies that did business in then-apartheid South Africa. At the time, my addled mind convinced me this was a great idea — despite the logical arguments from my Texan Conservative floormates that this would have zero impact on changing the government there.

So what I'm getting here is that Meyers equates big business to apartheid, a terrible evil that we are powerless to stop. Or he has favorable views of big business, much like he does of apartheid? Point is, public opinion will never end the ruthless control of big business, much in the same way that public opinion didn't stop apartheid. As you know, it flourishes today.

To be fair, another reading of the piece is that public demonstration is futile and people who participate are just fooling themselves. I'm pretty sure that what he wrote about the Tea Party rallies.

Big Journalism Throws In The Towel

How's morale over there at that big tent?

Herman Cain’s difficulties in handling a flurry of sexual harassment accusations–albeit launched by an overzealous, unfair mainstream media–have shaken confidence in his candidacy. Gov. Mitt Romney’s increasingly bold policy pronouncements may be too little, too late to convince the conservative base.

Gov. Rick Perry seems to have faded, and Newt Gingrich’s recent rise may not be big enough to establish him as the latest alternative to Romney. The other candidates are still trying to break into double digits, but aside from Ron Paul–whose isolationist foreign policy makes him unelectable–none has succeeded.

That has some analysts wondering if a new candidate might yet enter the race–and if so, who that would be.

The piece hints that it would be super-popular undefeated champion Sarah Palin. Okay by me! Go Sarah go!

This Is How The Tea Party Likes Their Heroes

Shouting down people with reasonable questions, and shutting down debate by threatening to throw their opponents out.



Joe Walsh, ladies and gentlemen - life's been good to him so far! See also Herman Cain's press conference acumen.

Assuming the Best

Among Republican Presidential candidates, Herman Cain and Mitt Romney currently seem to be in a tie for front runner. I'm interested in the notion Cain was farther ahead last week, after the first stories about his alleged sexual harassment emerged but before a few others reared their heads (nudge nudge) to make them seem credible. It seems safe to assume that most Republicans assumed it was a manufactured story and that Cain was just the victim of a smear campaign.

So here's what we can assume about Republican voters. They don't approve of a guy who spends his organization's money to solve a problem, like Mitt Romney did with health care in Massachusetts. They DO approve of a guy who spends his organization's money to HIDE a problem, like Cain did with these settlements.

This seems to me very similar to another aspect of the Republican mindset, the idea that you can "cure" someone of being gay. You can't of course. In fact, if you really pressed Republicans about this, they would not insist that homosexuality itself is a choice - after all, it would mean that all of them, at one point, chose heterosexuality. What IS a choice is whether you act gay. Ken Mehlman, for example, acted straight and was put in CHARGE of stuff. Nobody had a problem with Mark Foley until he was undeniably gay. Nobody has a problem with Rick Perry or Eric Cantor, because they're both deniably gay. Perry is probably taking it a little too far in the other direction.

Another Warning to Jewish Republicans

Earlier this week, GOP gubernatorial candidate and Kentucky Senate President David Williams fired at Kentucky Gov. Steve Beshear (D) for taking part in a ceremonial Hindu ground blessing — accusing Beshear of “idolatry” for attending the Hindu ceremony. On Wednesday, Williams clarified his remarks, but his clarification is even more offensive than his original statement. Although Williams says that it is everyone’s “right to be a Hindu person if they want to,” he hopes “their eyes are opened and they receive Jesus Christ as their personal savior.”

That's right Lieberman - vote with whoever you please, but remember that they're going to tie you up and baptize you first chance they get.

As it happens, I hope that Williams realizes that all organized religion is a means toward fundraising, and that he renounces them. But I'm not making laws on his behalf.

An Image That I Wish Wasn't So Resonant



If Romney wins the nomination, it'll be Obama under that Romney mask.

Finally, Repbulicans Introduce a Jobs Bill

The Republican sponsor of a resolution reaffirming that "In God We Trust" is the national motto of the U.S. said his legislation is needed because President Obama and other public officials often forget that designation.

"Unfortunately, there are a number of public officials who forget what the national motto is, whether intentionally or unintentionally," Rep. Randy Forbes (R-Va.) said in late Tuesday afternoon debate in the House. "There are those who become confused as to whether or not it can still be placed on our buildings, whether it can be placed in our school classrooms.

"Almost a year ago, the president in making a speech across the world said that our national motto was 'E pluribus unum,' " Forbes added. "When the Visitor Center was opened ... they did not have the national motto in there. In fact, they inscribed in the stones that our national motto was 'E pluribus unum.' "

Sorry, My mistake. I assumed by now they were going to introduce a jobs bill.

Leave Herman Alone!

Pizza magnate Herman Cain has had a rough week. Republicans are attacking him, he is trying to smooth over the discovery of a 20-year-old sexual harrassment incident by Politco, there is a scandal involving the serious misuse of political donations, and he revealed yesterday that he thinks China doesn't have nuclear weapons and he must stop them from getting some.

9-9-9 people! None of that other stuff matters! As president he will work with the congress that is attacking him (whoever is running it by then) to fix the tax code. If there is anything going on internationally, we can just, you know, sit it out for a few years. What this country needs is a guy like Cain, who knows how to create jobs, and put him in a position where he believes that he mustn't do anything to effect the creation of jobs.

Look, if Cain is out of the race, then it's a choice between a centrist who leans to the right and Romney. We can't let this happen. Let it be a choice between a black man with experience in governance and black man without any.

NoNoNoNoNoNo

Wonkette was right, I shouldn't have clicked on this NSFW link. No, I'm not at work, but because Guy Fawkes masks creep me out under the best of circumstances.

Yes, it's one of the mild ones.

Watch That Pause

Rick Perry, inverviewed by Neil Cavuto:



ThinkProgress characterizes it as Perry refusing to answer. I say it's the pause of a guy who isn't sure what he just said and needs to process it because he doesn't want to consider the possibility that he IS one of those Occupy Wall Street Guys.

Anyway this is a sign that the Tea Party has decided Rick Perry is no longer their BFF and in fact, their best chance to win the presidency is whatever black man they have available, no matter how ill-informed or nutty. It's a good strategy: the American people seem to like black people nowadays, and it worked so well with Michael Steele.

Don't Listen To This Guy!

He's probably a muslim extremist.

Unemployment - Embrace It!

Look, what are you 99 percenters upset about? If you don't have jobs its your own fault! If more of you are unemployed then in 2007, it's because more of you are lazy bastards who don't want a job.

Still that doesn't mean the Republicans aren't in there doing what they can to get you more jobs. For one thing, they're refusing to allow a vote on Obama's Jobs Bill. For another, Tea Party Nation is demanding that small businesses stop hiring people. WHERE ARE THE JOBS, MR PRESIDENT?

I, an American small business owner, part of the class that produces the vast majority of real, wealth producing jobs in this country, hereby resolve that I will not hire a single person until this war against business and my country is stopped.

Also until Sharia law is banned, I resolve to blow up all public buildings! And until my wife apologizes for accusing me of kissing other women, I will sleep with other women!

It seems a little over the line but you know what? Sometimes you have to take extreme measures to keep people from wrecking the economy.

(Side note: check out the quote at the begininning of the manifesto - from the movie of Atlas Shrugged. Does no one say it in the novel? Like the guy who wrote the Call For a Strike, I've never read it either.)

A Startling Glimpse Into The Afterlife

It's curious that they thought Quadaffi would hold onto his looks like that but hey, details.

The Future of the GOP

Who's going to win the Republican primary? I don't know exactly, but this is what it's going to be like

The majority of people who vote for that candidate will hate them and wish one of the others had won. Even if they despise the winner, they will vote for them, because they'd rather have someone they despise and disagree with in every way than Barack Obama.

Oh and Herman Cain will drop out of the race for reasons that no one will quite be able to explain.

Obama Should Be Very, Very Frightened

Well, the primaries are coming up and more and more it's looking like your choice is as follows:

A cult member who champions abortion and authored an even more socialist version of Obamacare.

A man who wants to eliminate your tax deductions and raise your personal tax bill to 18%, (and corporations to 9%) plus is in favor of spending your taxes on bailing out banks.

A guy from Texas who strongly reminds you of... uh... I just can't remember. He was president some time in the recent past. Never forget!

A guy with fake eyebrows.

Oh, and Newt Gingrich. He's looking good!

There IS A Republican Jobs Bill!

President Obama's comprehensive jobs bill was killed yesterday in the Senate. WHERE ARE THE JOBS, OBUMMER? Or as Mitch McConnell more subtly said, "Democrats' sole proposal is to keep doing what hasn't worked, along with a massive tax hike that we know won't create jobs. Why on earth would you support an approach that we already know won't work?" Indeed, it's just common sense that if we lower taxes down from where they were in say, the nineties, then unemployment will finally fall.


But the Republicans haven't actually put fourth a jobs bill with the vital lowering taxes component. Even in Congress, where they run the place. You might think they don't actually HAVE a jobs plan. You're wrong! A very sensible plan that is guaranteed to increase employment has been proposed, by state representative with the zen-balanced name of Ritch Workman.

So Rep. Ritch Workman, R-Melbourne, filed a bill this week to bring back "dwarf tossing," the barbaric and dangerous barroom spectacle that was imported from Australia and thrived briefly in Florida before it was outlawed in 1989. "I'm on a quest to seek and destroy unnecessary burdens on the freedom and liberties of people," Workman said. "This is an example of Big Brother government. "All that it does is prevent some dwarfs from getting jobs they would be happy to get," Workman said. "In this economy, or any economy, why would we want to prevent people from getting gainful employment?"

I'm all for this - if the dwarves are willing to do this kind of work, I say let 'em. Of course, the non-dwarf community is unlikely to benefit from this, and on a national scale, we might have to expand it to include, say, software-specialist tossing or real-estate agent tossing. But on the whole, a worthy plan Republicans! I'm sorry I doubted you.

Quote Of The Day, Makes Its Own Gravy Edition

"Believe it or not, some in this town have actually condoned the pitting of Americans against Americans."

-Eric Cantor, talking to the Values Voters summit last Friday.

Liberal Media Outrage - Hank Williams Jr. Fired!

It's official - apparently appearing in a drunken rambling live television interview and comparing the president to Hitler IS enough to get you knocked off a lucrative royalties-saturated gig in an unrelated field. Hank Williams Jr. is out! 

Tea Party nation demands that you stop watching Monday Night Football. Football has a liberal bias!  Perhaps they will devise their own football, using patriot-styled uniforms and no dusky players. Maybe they can call it the TPFL. 

Good news though! From the Tea Party Nation link:

Hank Williams, Jr. is rumored to be thinking about running for the US Senate in Tennessee. As a Tennessean, all I can say is, “Run Hank Run!”

I see a LOT more money coming in for Mr. W. Jr. Can you say, "HankPac?" Hey it worked for Sarah Palin. If he doesn't run, he can always go the Charlie Sheen route and make his money back in frivolous lawsuits.

Can't We Fix This With CGI?

I don't feel like addressing Steve Jobs yet, but remember if it hadn't have been for the iPhone, all cel phones would look like this. (Of course they wouldn't. I just said...!)

Important Thinking From The Other Blog

Skippy the Bush Kangaroo - what did he MEAN?

Plus Ca Change C'est la Meme Chose

Cake anyone?

I Don't Need To Wear Myself Out Hammering Nails Into THAT Coffin

Herman Cain saying it, that's just primary campaign talk. But this is FOX NEWS talking.

So we're back where we started! Who is the Republican nominee? Better answer quick because from the looks of things, some states are threatening to have their primaries in December.

The New Christie Minstrels

My vlog Wednesday night, about Chris Christie's expected entry into the Republican primary, drew criticism. And I was expecting some - it was a cheap shot about how awful all the other Republican candidates are, and how Christie's weight made him a terrible choice for President of the United States. I'd expect people to rise in the defense of the slate of candidates and rip into me for my juvenile "comedy" argument, making fun of a fat man without even taking the trouble to enumerate his positions on the issues.

Interestingly, this is not the approach that my (limited) readership took.

Rather than address my points, they chose to tacitly agree with them and point out that I, too, am too unattractive to run for president. In fact, if I'm misreading their arguments correctly, I have no right to criticize Christie because I am as fat as he is. I'm a little taken aback by that notion - the man doesn't look like he's 155 pounds to me.

But I'm biased. Maybe he is the same weight as I am, which begs the question: is America ready for a president who's only 4'3" tall?

Anyway, even though they wouldn't address my points directly (or even tell me that they HAD failed to address them) it's nice to know that I and my 'bagger friends agree that there are no electable Republicans running right now. And none on the horizon. They'll find their shining star like they did last time - three weeks before the election.

Actually three weeks is a little too much exposure - expect the real nominee to emerge around noon on Election Day.

Welcome Chris Christie

Frequent Debates Raising Awareness of Republican Candidates

Yes indeed, the RNC was wise to schedule so many debates with all the Republican candidates.

 

And even wiser to have them so early!

Candidate for Next Government Shutdown Issue

You know why this happened?

Too much regulation. If we'd just stop insisting that companies use public lands with an eye toward safety, we'd all be better off! I bet you could save a couple of bucks a month on natural gas for starters. And you'd need it, to put toward property insurance.

The Power Of Positive Thinking is Nil

Gov. Nikki Haley wants state workers to answer their phones, saying, “It’s a great day in South Carolina. How can I help you?”

Tuesday, Haley instructed the directors of Cabinet agencies, which report to her, to change the way their employees answer the phones. Haley said the change will boost the morale of state workers, remind them they work for the callers on the other end of the line and help her sell the state to employers.

...However, Dick Harpootlian, chairman of the S.C. Democratic Party, said Haley’s approach is silly. “She believes that if you say the lie enough, people may begin to believe it. But we know the state is in the toilet,” Harpootlian said, referring to the state’s 11.1 percent unemployment rate, the fourth-highest rate in the nation.

To be fair, it's a way to fix all the state's problems without paying a dime. It's worked before! Claiming that there is no longer any racism in America has completely eliminated the need for Affirmative Action quotas. Rick Perry's innovative climate initiatives (to solve a drought he held a state-wide prayer meeting to entreat God for rain) prevented having to pay money to help farmers. Saying there were WMDs in Iraq made the country dangerous enough to invade! See? And all for free.

Occupy Wall Street, Or Whatever

Hey, did you know this was going on? Probably not. After all, a few thousand people is hardly a thing worth covering. It doesn't DESERVE national attention. A protest that small is obviously the work of a tiny, insignificant minority.

People who shouldn't be influencing the policy of the whole nation.

Oh, THAT'S The Tea Party Agenda!

Michelle Bachmann, the Tea Party's most articulate spokesperson now that Sarah Palin has dropped out of the race (Yes she has. Don't argue with me.) has finally put it out there, the crazy underlying code that explains their weirdo behavior.

"So we don’t have to go to the side, we don’t have to sit on the back of the bus in this election."  (italics mine)


The Tea Party sees itself either as the negroes of 2011, marginalized, brutalized, ignored by society; OR more likely they resent the fact that the Negroes were given special laws and quotas and this is their way to call attention to the horrible injustice of it. This is why they coined the term "teabagger" and then shrieked at you if YOU used it. Sounds like that other word with the double G in the middle, right? Get it?

If so when will they stop? Probably when the Negroes are put back in their place, and things go back to the way they were in the fifties. Life was great in the fifties! Then, a negro rose on the basis of his merit! If very few of them rose, well, there's obviously a reason for that, right?

They wouldn't even have brought it up if a common street negro hadn't been elected President.

As usual in posts of this kind, I'm looking forward to the commenters proving me wrong. Because honestly, I hope I am.

A Thing In The Woods

 Just a little somethin' for the people I once argued with who don't think their side demonizes opponents.

At Last, It's Safe To Boo Active Duty Service Men

Before DADT was repealed, you never knew which were the gay ones. You might boo a straight active-duty serviceman by mistake!



Kudos to Santorum for pointing out that sex has no place in the military. Any kind of sex. If you are in the Army, thinking about women, you should GET THE HELL OUT NOW.

And Note, She Still Doesn't Answer It

You shouldn't have to pay any taxes!  But you need to pay some taxes. But Obama is for taxes, so no taxes! But you need to pay some taxes.

Hey, why did Fox News make her look like she has crazy eyes?

Shmisaster Relief

Not rebuilding after natural disasters - it's good for the economy!

Nothing Infuriates Fox More than Any Random Thing

If the 2008 financial crisis caused the nation to tighten its belt, the Justice Department didn’t get the memo.

The federal agency spent about $490,000 on food and beverages at 10 conferences, including $16 apiece for muffins, more than a dollar an ounce for coffee and $32 per person on snacks, according to a new report from the Justice Department’s inspector general.

The half-a-million-dollar tab represented more than 10 percent of the $4.4 million total cost of the events that were held between October 2007 and September 2009.

Wow, the Fox news guys are pretty worked up about this! I can't remember when I've seen them so worked up about something! Oh wait, yes I can.

Quote Of The Day, Only You Can Prevent Edition

Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke with his unenviable job of trying to save the crumbling American economy with interest rate tweaks and twists is sort of like a firefighter standing before a Texas wildfire who gets to shoot at it with a water pistol while everyone yells at him about the size and type of his water pistol. The GOP leadership, on the other hand, is more like a different firefighter who stands a little further away and fires torpedoes into the blaze in the hopes that he will be elected winner of the smoldering remains after his colleagues have been burned alive.

-Kristen Boyd Johnson, Wonkette

If Buffett Can Do It So Can You Pal

Tree Of Liberty

OMG! Bringing the rich's taxes back up is CLASS WARFARE!

That seems a little extreme to most of us, but not to a handful of crazies with Glochs. Once you start throwing that kind of rhetoric around, well, there's no way of telling how those people will react. Probably a handful of them will attempt to kill some Democrats, and probably the pundits will claim that they themselves were Democrats.

Breitbart Calls For Pre-Emptive Killing of Liberals

Hey, he comes right out and says he's not kidding. It seems a little harsh, shooting people because they are going to insult you. I suppose you could call it overkill.

Crazy-Eyes Thing Still Goin' Strong

Poor Michele Bachmann can't win! First bloggers make her look bad by circulating pictures that make her eyes look crazy. Then Newsweek does the same thing, putting a crazy-eyes picture on the cover.

Now her own publisher turns against her by using pictures that Michele Bachmann naively approved, that make her eyes look crazy. What's next? Public appearances where the stage lighting make her look like some crazy-eyed person. Is EVERYBODY trying to make Michele Bachmann look crazy?

Ron Paul Is No Hypocrite

That clip I ran yesterday, in which Ron Paul said that it's not his responsibility to care for the uninsured, was based on a hypothetical guy. Let's take a look at a real one!

Back in 2008, Kent Snyder — Paul's former campaign chairman — died of complications from pneumonia. Like the man in Blitzer's example, the 49-year-old Snyder was relatively young and seemingly healthy when the illness struck. He was also uninsured. When he died on June 26, 2008, two weeks after Paul withdrew his first bid for the presidency, his hospital costs amounted to $400,000. The bill was handed to Snyder's surviving mother, who was incapable of paying. Friends launched a website to solicit donations.

Charity fell short in this case, by about 9/10s of what was needed. If Paul seems a little more troubled in the clip than your typical Tea Party candidate, that's probably why; the question wasn't hypothetical at all. Tentative props to Wolf Blitzer for bringing it up.

I know that bad things happen to good people, and no system is perfect, but we're the only Western nation in which this guy couldn't receive care. On the whole, Germany's economy or France's or England's is no worse off than ours is, and they manage to provide medical care for everybody. When you're figuring death panels into your policy decisions, keep in mind that one hero of the Right is absolutely okay with trimming you from the herd.

Quote of the Day, Priorities Edition

"I am not positive that Gohmert is serious about this particular bill. It may be more of a finger in Obama’s eye because he was so incompetent as not to have introduced his own bill... What ever Gohmert’s real intentions, it is delicious political theater, regardless.

- Warner Todd Huston, Publius' Forum

Yeah, thanks for the delicious political theatre boys! Hey, I know it's hard to produce top-drawer entertainment when you're distracted but I wonder if maybe you could put someone to work on reducing unemployment and preventing a recession. I know that's not what we elected you for but it's just... there are so many of you and you can probably spare someone. As it is, you're asking the President to take up the slack and WRITE YOUR BILLS FOR YOU.

The War On Objects

Look, we know Americans want the government to do something about jobs, and they will! As soon as the Republicans stop the other things that threaten our way of life: Tire Guages, CFC light bulbs, teleprompters, and now paper clips.



Quit laughing, this is IMPORTANT. If George Bush were running the country this report would have been printed on gold leaf and bound with the finest silk, woven by a thousand virgins worms. And the plan would have been cut taxes and go to war with Iran.

Reagan would never have used paper clips or teleprompters!!!!!

There Is No Tea Party, So There Was No Debate Last Night

Though if there WAS a Tea Party, hypothetically they would drive by you as you lay bleeding in a ditch.

Because you were, you know, too stupid to avoid an accident.

Meanwhile, how are those Tea Party policies playing in America? Let's just say swell, shall we? Americans love the refusal to govern, and they don't want Government meddling in unemployment. Yeah, let's say that.

Power to Me!

I don't know how it happened, but I'm thrilled to report that my portion of Southern California HAS power,  Other's don't!

As I write this I'm using my big screen TV as a monitor while air conditioning AND a fan blasts me with coolness. I have a couple of Omaha Steaks Filet Mignons in the freezer, and for kicks I'm running one of those Van De Graaf generators with a Jacob's Ladder zzzzzzzt zzzzzzzzt zzzzzzzzt things buzzing away in the corner.

Look, lay off, it helps me sleep.

They Could Have Had This AND The President's Speech

Ironically, Reagan signed several tax increases into law. True story!

Rick Perry Panics, Gets Off Message

From today's Austin-American Statesman:

Three days after fires started to burn in Central Texas, Gov. Rick Perry today expressed frustration that federal firefighting support, including equipment from Fort Hood, has yet to make its way to the firefighters. Perry said the firefighters could use heavy equipment such as bulldozers to clear fire breaks. “It’s more difficult than it should be,”he said. “When you have people hurting, when lives are in danger, I don’t care who owns the asset.”

Rick! Can I call you Rick? Rick, you'll get your federal aid as soon as we decide what federal programs to cut to offset the cost. What about this don't you understand? In the meantime, use your own fire department. Those guys are equipped to -- what? You did WHAT? Well all right then. Your problem isn't that you can't fight the fires, it's that you're not willing to gracefully give up the stuff that's burning. Stop complaining and start making plans for your charred earth. Hope local businesses aren't hurt! They say immolation is bad for employment.

Good On Ya, Sarah Palin

Meanwhile, former beauty queen and occaisional Fox News contributor Sarah Palin shows remarkable restraint by not commenting about Eric Golub's comments over the weekend. He compares Trig, her "special needs child" to stupid America-hating terrorist sympathizers for a laugh, and she allows it. Why? Because free speech is more important to Sarah Palin than the honor of her family.

Tea Party Just Kidding This Time

The Tea Party Express has called on President Obama to “condemn this inappropriate and uncivil rhetoric,” saying it “has no place in the public forum.”

“Jimmy Hoffa’s remarks are inexcusable and amount to a call for violence on peaceful tea party members, which include many Teamster members,” Tea Party Express chair Amy Kremer said in a written statement.

Of course, they don't mean it, because if the government criticizes uncivil rhetoric, it's ABRIDGING FREE SPEECH. So Amy Kremer is only kidding folks. Ignore her.

Oh, I almost forgot to include what Hoffa said, speaking before President Obama at a Labor Day rally yesterday. Not that it matters.

We got to keep an eye on the battle that we face: The war on workers. And you see it everywhere, it is the Tea Party. President Obama, this is your army...We are ready to march. Let’s take these sons of bitches out and give America back to an America where we belong.

Running It Up The Flagpole is All

Now this is an interesting idea!

Doesn't go far enough though. Sure the poor vote in their own self interest, but what about the middle class! They do too, and there's a lot more of them! Allowing the poor and middle class to vote is un-American!

The Final Solution

Yep, that's it right there, my Roomba. I turned the thing on before I left and it was crawling around for an hour or so, ample time to nudge a very light timer all over everything. I was just lucky it didn't wind up under the bed!

I suppose if there's any moral to take away from this incident, it's this: If I guy comes up to you on the street tells you that robots are hiding his stuff...you know what, just get away from him. Your first impression is usually right.

Mystery Part 3 - One Final Clue!

Look, I'm sorry it isn't a more compelling mystery you guys. By "you guys" I mean YOU Karen!

Anyway, you can conclude this from what I said: the timer fell off its magnet to the floor, and something moved it around the apartment, leaving it to rest 20 feet away. If you're into this stuff, you've already figured it's a gadget of some kind, because I love them so much. And it's a gadget I didn't mention in the paragraph about my gadgets, because I already told you that I didn't tell you enough.

So your job now is to consider what kind of machine does that.

Mystery Part 2

See the last post, to which this is the continuance.

You probably haven't found my Chinese Cooking Timer yet, because I haven't given you enough data. If you have been to my place you might have figured it out but otherwise no.

Recall that I said there was an important clue in the second paragraph: this will rule out pets. I don't have a dog or cat (or lorakeet or monkey, like my neighbors - oh wait, that's a teenager) and didn't allude to any such thing in the paragraph. More clues? Okay, here's one. It's where I found the timer.

Apologies for bad photography - the timer is face down in the living room, by the front door, around 20 feet away. Interestingly, it could have been on the floor ANYWHERE IN THE APARTMENT.

More soon.

Me and My First World Problems: A Mini-Mystery

I ran into a problem tonight that was interesting, in the sense that everything about it wouldn't have been possible when I was growing up and what's more, it couldn't happen to people much poorer than I am. And I'm not exactly rich, people!

You need to know this before I start - I loves me some gadgets. I live alone but I own two computers and a big-screen TV with a 240 mhz frame rate, because I can't tolerate 60 frames a second. If I felt like it, I could be watching that TV now as my second monitor. I have a GPS in a car and a digital speedometer on my bike. The pictures that I illustrate this with were taken with my iPhone. Only one phrase in this whole paragraph is a clue to the mystery that follows.

A few weeks back I ordered up a Digital Cooking Timer from eBay. It's Chinese and it would have cost me a dollar if it wasn't for shipping. It looked like this when I left for work this morning:

There it is, stuck to my freezer door with a magnet.

I came home from work and I decided to cook up an Omaha Steaks hamburger patty with some roasted potatoes I buy from Trader Joes. I was melting butter in a skillet when I moved to set the timer and I saw this:

What you're looking at there is a magnet, no longer attached to a timer. A tiny bit of adhesive facing out suggested the magnet was inadequately glued in place. My eyes went to the floor only to find... floor.

Where was my timer? I live alone, and I determined that no one had been in my apartment since I left at 8:00 am. The answer will be in my next post but I want to encourage guessing in the mean time.