We Hardly Knew Ye

Just like Oz or Barsoom, there is a parallel world out there. In some ways it is like our own, but in others it is a nightmarish surreal parody of it. For example, this guy.

What the hell is that, you are asking if you're an American. Well, my love of British television has lead me to subscribe to the Twitter feed of one Graham Linehan, creator of The IT Crowd and Father Ted and Black's Books, eccentric little gems of sitcom goodness. And no, Graham is not the guy with the papier mache head depicted above. However, one of his little side themes this last week was about that guy.  His name? Frank Sidebottom.

Sidebottom, from what I'm reading, was a cult comedy figure in the eighties. He had recently made the news again with a song about the World Cup Matches called Three Shirts On My Line. However, this good news was eclipsed when, in the last week, he died of complications from an operation to remove a tumor from his chest. To be more specific Chris Sievey, the creative genius inside the head, died and took Sidebottom with him.

So I'm reading this outpouring of appreciation and grief for Frank Sidebottom, a character that has absolutely no resonance for me because up until 4 days ago I had absolutely no knowledge of him. It's like the famous actor's nightmare, where you're on stage but you don't know the lines or the blocking. Except, of course, no one is expecting me to speak. Still, it is very odd to process nostalgia without any context. Sure you used to do it with your parents; but this is a guy who might have been MY cultural touchstone had I only been aware.

You know what? I bet the Brits would feel the same way about Larry the Cable Guy.

Why So Socialist, Part II

Finally, a break in the case!

The picture should look familar to you.

Bored during his winter school break, Firas Alkhateeb, a senior history major at the University of Illinois, crafted the picture of Obama with the recognizable clown makeup using Adobe's Photoshop software.

Alkhateeb had been tinkering with the program to improve the looks of photos he had taken on his clunky Kodak camera. The Joker project was his grandest undertaking yet. Using a tutorial he'd found online about how to "Jokerize" portraits, he downloaded the October 23 Time Magazine cover of Obama and began digitally painting over it.

Four or five hours later, he happily had his product.

..."I abstained from voting in November," he wrote in an e-mail. "Living in Illinois, my vote means close to nothing as there was no chance Obama would not win the state." If he had to choose a politician to support, Alkhateeb said, it would be Ohio Democratic Rep. Dennis Kucinich.

"I think he's definitely doing better than Bush was," Alkhateeb said of Obama. Alkhateeb's views on foreign relations align with the Democrats, he said, while he prefers Republican ideals on domestic issues...Alkhateeb's assessment of Obama: "In terms of domestic policy, I don't think he's really doing much good for the country right now," he said. "We don't have to 'hero worship' the guy.

Regardless, Alkhateeb does agree with the Obama "Hope" artist about "socialism" being the wrong caption for the Joker image. "It really doesn't make any sense to me at all," he said. "To accuse him of being a socialist is really ... immature. First of all, who said being a socialist is evil?"

As I suspected, the SOCIALISM portion was completely disconnected from the visual. What I didn't divine was that the artist so revered by the right was both a sufferer of Bush Derangement Syndrome AND a Kucinich supporter. And let's face it, at this point Firas Alkhateeb is the next shining star of the Republican Party and will probably win the nomination in 2012, so you guys brace yourselves.

Orwell That Ends Well

I love stuff like this, in the same way that I love slowing down at car wrecks on the freeway. Did you know that there are over 30 public surveillance cameras in the vicinity around George Orwell's historic London home? Ha ha ha... 1984 is funny because it's true!

In the DIGG comments under this story, someone points out that his girlfriend's bike was stolen in London, and they have footage of the perp from about a dozen angles, but the police say they are unable to catch him. Gosh, why would those cameras even be up if it isn't to catch criminals?

Personally, I'm a middle child but I have a big SISTER, so the idea of a Big Brother might appeal to me. But if the dude takes me away in the dead of night and brainwashes me, maybe I'd be happier as an orphan. If I ever pursue my dream of making a new life in England, I think I'll live in Cardiff. Even with Torchwood and their temporal rift.

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5 Decades And Their Iconic Objects

Decade: The 1950's
Object: A Pit Barbecue
Why: The 50's was a reaction to World War II. Instead of traveling to foreign lands to commit the ultimate transgression of killing to save the world, men were called upon to make a home and raise a family. The pit barbecue is a place where men cook, not alone, and the brick enclosure represents a permanence.
Prominent Object which doesn't represent the decade: bongo drums. Sure there were beatniks around, but they were nowheresville.

Decade: The 1960's
Object: A Gun With a Flower In The Barrel
Why: You'll be hard pressed to find a decade in American history which had this much internal conflict. Yeah, there was that one with the Civil War, but the sixties actually posited, among other things, youth versus age, war versus anti-war, black versus white, witch versus mortal, electric versus folk, and God (Clapton) versus Satan (Jagger). Conflicted decade, conflicted symbol.
Prominent Object which doesn't represent the decade: black monolith - could have made the cut had it been a duolith!

Decade: The 1970's
Object: Puka Shell Necklace
Why: Like the fifties, the seventies was more a reaction to a turbulent decade than a decade itself. Having taken on society's greatest problems and failing to resolve them, we were content to retreat into trivia, novelty and silly pleasure. Do not forget that a disco remake of Beethoven's 5th symphony topped the charts during the seventies! Hence the necklace, which was jewelry and yet unattractive. It literally screamed, "leave me alone! Don't look at me!"
Prominent Object which doesn't represent the decade: mirrored disco ball - they were all over the place, but too fragmented to reflect anything meaningful.
Footnote: We went through the whole decade without a single good president.

Decade: The 1980's
Object: The Korg Synthesizer
Why: It is no coincidence that music in the eighties was so synth-heavy. The synth is a single piece of musical equipment which, when properly tweaked, can take the place of any other. It represents unlimited potential. And so in the eighties. Without a big trauma for ten years, people were ready to dream big. The stock market swelled as people committed their funds to make them even more funds. The gyms of America were overrun with flabby bodies of all ages, now realizing that they could be perfect. Cocaine, the meglomanic's drug of choice, flourished. We all wanted it all, right now.
Prominent Object which doesn't represent the decade: Rubik's cube. Don't be such a braniac, spazz.

Decade: the 1990s
Object: Blue Dress With Semen Stain
Why: Let's face it, aside from that impeachment unpleasantness, things were pretty good in the nineties. We had record economic growth, we weren't at war with anyone significant for any significant length, and technology was advancing pleasantly along. Things were going so swimmingly that we could afford to waste time on trivia like the president's sex life and treat it like a high crime. Idle hands! Come to think of it... never mind, the innuendo wasn't worth the space.
Prominent Object which doesn't represent the decade: Cell phone. But they ARE really cool.

Now of course we're rounding up another decade... any early ideas on what this decade means and what the object is?