Friday, December 21, 2012

The First Casualty is Talking Points

In today's speech by Wayne LaPierre the trusted Frenchman proposed that schools be patrolled by armed volunteers, trained by the NRA. It caused a shockwave throughout the conservative community, because they had to weigh this idea against the idea of gun control. The volunteers won.

Why? Because.

A: Airport security is actually effective and has prevented terrorism. You might have thought from reading that a lot of the right regarded the TSA as useless but you were mistaken - a knee-jerk reaction to a single incident is just what the doctor ordered!

B: The New Black Panthers and union thugs aren't dangerous at all! As you can see from this conversation, they're just as likely to be folk who you want to give a rifle to so they can be around your kids all day.

C. Violent rhetoric leads to violence. Remember when I was all, dude, maybe back up on the "tree of liberty" talk and they were all, hey, chill, crazy people be crazy no matter what you say, yo? Turns out they don't believe that at all! It's movies and videogames and rap music that causes these shootings.

So a volunteer national army trained and financed by the NRA is the sensible solution to gun violence, and silencing the media is the only way to protect America's freedom to carry arms. It's guaranteed in the constitution!

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