A Boy Can Dream

Donald Trump, no longer satisfied with just a birth certificate, now insists that Obama was a terrible magna cum laude.

"I'd like to know how does he get into Harvard, how does he get into Columbia if he isn't a very good student," Donald Trump told the press this morning in New Hampshire.

"If he wants to release it that's fine, if he doesn't want to release it that's fine too. But the word is he wasn't a very good student," Trump added.

Meanwhile, George Stephanopolis follows up on Trump's pledge to release his tax returns when Obama shows the Birth Certificate:

My colleague Michael Falcone caught up with Trump in New Hampshire and asked him if he would follow through and release his tax returns.

“That’s something I would be thinking about doing anyway. That is certainly something I’d be thinking about doing anyway. But before I do anything I have to make the decision in June and the first thing I’m going to be releasing will be financials,” Trump said.

Falcone asked again, will you fulfill that pledge that you made where you said I’m going to tie the birth certificate to my tax records?

“Yeah, at the appropriate time,” Trump responded.

“So you’ll do it?”

“Yeah, at the appropriate time I’m going to do it,” Trump told him.

Here's my fantasy response from the president:

College records? It's your turn to dance, monkeyboy. Let's see the financials. 


Sure it would be perpetuating a non-issue, but at this point it's all about entertainment anyway.

What Is This Doing On Fox Business Channel?

And why are these people rooting for Donald Trump, who is the only thing keeping NBC alive? I'm not saying this is important, but it's legitimate to raise questions.

By the way, very clever of Obama, releasing his birth certificate just to cut into sales of a book called WHERE IS THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE? Unfair! UNFAIR!

Chess

This morning Hawaii broke with its policy on the request of the President, and released a long-form version of the birth certificate that a handful of nutters have been insisting is the only proof that he is an American citizen. Clearly this could have been arranged at any time, so you have to wonder why now? Or rather, why not earlier?

If he'd wanted to put this issue to rest he'd have made a couple of calls during the campaign and sent his lawyer up to City Hall all the way back in 2008. He didn't then because birtherism makes Republicans look bad. People who accepted the normal Hawaiian birth certificate would look at the Republican party and see Orly Taitz;  the Republican Party is a nutty blonde lawyer/dentist who screams her way through interviews.

No rational person believes this certificate was a real issue; Republicans keep saying it is a real issue, therefore Republicans aren't rational.  Plus, it calls into question their global warming skepticism. And don't forget the subtle undertone of racism - aren't all black folk from Kenya? Well, this one must be, at least!

So the next question is what has Obama to gain by releasing now, instead of say, a couple of weeks before he's re-elected?

You might think it's to get Donald Trump out of the way, but I can't believe he was that great a threat. In fact if anything, Donald Trump was a Godsend to the DNC for the same reasons. Republicans are blowhard reality TV phonies with hair problems! He never would have declared candidacy anyway, because of the financial disclosure requirements. So Trump himself wasn't the motivation. He's a sideshow.

I'm guessing two possibilities - either Republicans go on with the birth issue thing anyway (check out the scare quotes in this headline!) which makes them look even worse to the normals (win for Obama!) or they drop it and are forced to debate him on policy (probable win for Obama, because he has adopted so many Republican positions that they have few left that they can fight him on). Beyond that there is always possibility #3, that someone starts the rumor that Obama IS Osama Bin Laden, shaved and coached in a Chicago accent. But really, that's just a variation of the birther argument.

The Egg and O

Washington -- President Obama and his family attended Easter services Sunday at a Washington church founded in 1863 by freed slaves.

The first family entered Shiloh Baptist Church to a round of applause on a sun-splashed day in the nation's capital as members of a choir dressed in black sang "Total Praise."

Obama shook a few hands and hugged some members of the congregation as he and his wife, Michelle, and their daughters, Malia and Sasha, walked to a second-row pew.

According to the church's pastor, Dr. Wallace Charles Smith, 21 freed slaves made it to the nation's capital from Fredericksburg, Va., to establish a place where they could worship freely and where "they could reach others with the good news of their salvation."

Thanks Fox News/Associated Press from Sunday! So what else is going on?

Barack Hussein Obama ignored Easter yesterday. He issued no statements of any kind, no “Happy Easter”, no nothing. By comparison he has issued glowing, effusive statements of praise for each and every Muslim holiday since he took office. Hasn’t missed one of them. So it is quite interesting that yesterday as believers celebrated the Risen Lord Jesus around the the globe, that the God of Heaven who controls the wind and the weather chose to strike the White House with lightning. And something tells me that there’s more coming…stay tuned.

“A storm rapidly materialized in the Southern sky, and swept from the National Mall toward the White House. Instantly, there seemed to be lightning bolts dropping out of the heavens all around 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue–and the wind kicked up dramatically.

What is God trying to tell us? GOD WANTS US TO KEEP OUT OF CHURCH.

Seems Reasonable To M -- Wait, WHAT?

Here's a good litmus test - is this guy racist or not? After all, he SAYS he isn't.

Take THAT, Talking Point!

From far-left liberal rag The Wall Street Journal: Apparently the millionaires aren't so inclined to escape higher taxes as everyone says.

The study, by sociologists Cristobal Young at Stanford and Charles Varner at Princeton, studied the migration patterns of New Jersey’s millionaires before and after 2004, when the state imposed a “millionaire’s tax” that raised rates on those earning $500,000 or more to 8.97% from 6.37%.

The study found that the overall population of millionaires increased during the tax period. Some millionaires moved out, of course. But they were more than offset by the creation of new millionaires.

The study dug deeper to figure out whether the millionaires who were moving out did so because of the tax. As a control group, they used New Jersey residents who earned $200,000 to $500,000–in other words, high-earners who weren’t subject to the tax. They found that the rate of out-migration among millionaires was in line with and rate of out-migration of submillionaires. The tax rate, they concluded, had no measurable impact.

“This suggests that the policy effect is close to zero,” the study says.

And remember, this is in NEW JERSEY, where everyone is always looking for a reason to move out.

Still, let's just take the word of all those people who say that if we roll back tax cuts they'll fire a bunch of people. I mean, the Bush tax cuts have been in place for years and the job market has never been better. Case closed!

Your State Legislature At Work

Watch this become politicized - TN Republicans DEMAND that dogs be allowed in the chambers! Democrats vote to fund a study of the effect of dogs in public places. Republicans nominate a dog in the primaries.

A Little Fresh Crazy For You

This proves nothing because it's a biased sample. But it's got entertainment value!

(Plus, even I could have done without the funny music cues. )

Fun FoxNews Headlines this Afternoon

Trump on 2012: 'I Think I've Made the Decision'


"I'm absolutely certain I'm committed to thinking about considering running for President. Possibly as an independent."
 
If We’re Eight Days Away From the Start of a Global Depression, Why is Obama Kicking it in Cali?


"Whassup dog? Yo, you illin? Put down that Malt Liquor and get to work! What's wrong with you people?"
 
Could Black Trees Blossom on a World With Two Suns?


This, incredibly, is listed under the "most read" tab. Are you buying that? It's illustrated with a still from Star Wars, which is a Fox film. I sense manipulation.
 
Arizona Gov. Brewer Vetoes Bill to Require Presidential Candidates to Prove Citizenship


Attention Warner Todd Huston - they didn't label her party! In the next few days, watch the netowrk for her to be mislabeled in the captions as a Democrat.

Republican Endgame - Greater National Debt

If you let us reduce the country's income, we'll allow it to borrow more! They were all cheering Bush on too when he did the exact same thing.

If you see a bunch of guys say "killing is wrong" but they immediately run off kill a bunch of things, assume that they're for killing.

Marilyn Davenport Gets It Right, A Little

See yesterday's post for more on this, but I give props to Marilyn Davenport for at least getting the optics right in this apology:

"To my fellow Americans and to everyone else who has seen this email I forwarded and was offended by my action, I humbly apologize and ask for your forgiveness of my unwise behavior. I say unwise because at the time I received and forwarded the email, I didn't stop to think about the historic implications and other examples of how this could be offensive," Davenport's apology read.

Republican Party Chairman Scott Baugh has reportedly entreated Davenport to resign from her position, as he has determined that the group's bylaws prevent its members from voting her out. He told the Associated Press he hopes to have an ethics committee investigate the incident.

As of Monday, Davenport said she had no intention of taking him up on the offer.

"I'm not going to resign," Davenport told the Orange County Weekly in an interview. "I really have no plans to do so. My constituents have told me not to resign, and I'm very happy with their support. Everybody who knows me says they can't believe people are calling me a racist. I am not a racist, but I do think I need to apologize again with different words."

"Basically, what I'm saying is that as a Christian I won't ever repeat this," she said. "I will be much wiser from now on."

Baugh said that despite Davenport's apology, he continued to condemn her behavior and believe she should resign.

"The email is without question extremely racist," Baugh said. "Depicting African-Americans as monkey is a longtime, well-known and particularly offensive slur because it denies them their basic humanity."

"The damage to the Republican Party has been done by her and I still think she should resign,"he added in an interview with the Weekly.

So is Baugh right? Should she resign? I'll put it this way: I hope she doesn't. But I hope the Republicans (and especially the Tea Party) get painted as a bunch of clueless racists. My hope is that the entire pundit  apparatus comes to the defense of Davenport, and also insists that reason that African-Americans are prone to criminal activity because of their brow size.  Therefore, she might think twice about the nature of MY support.

By the way, I just checked the FoxNews website. Check out their coverage of the whole incident!

What? WHAT? Part 25

First of all, let me remind everybody that this isn't a racism issue, and there's no racism involved, and that the Tea Party isn't racist, and there isn't even a Tea Party and if you think any of this is racist, then you're a racist.

The Weekly has obtained a copy of an email sent to fellow conservatives this week by Marilyn Davenport, a Southern California Tea Party activist and member of the central committee of the Orange County Republican Party.

Under the words, "Now you know why no birth certificate," there's an Obama family portrait showing them as apes.

That was published last Friday. Then:

UPDATE, APRIL 16, 5:55 P.M.: This afternoon, Marilyn Davenport sent an email to fellow Orange County Republican elected officials, apologizing if anyone was offended by her depicting President Barack Obama as an ape--while also blasting the "liberal media" for reporting the story.
"I simply found it amusing regarding the character of Obama and all the questions surrounding his origin of birth," Davenport wrote. "In no way did I even consider the fact he's half black when I sent out the email. In fact, the thought never entered my mind until one or two other people [Scott Baugh, Orange County GOP boss, and this writer] tried to make this about race. . . . I received plenty of emails about George Bush that I didn't particularly like yet there was no 'cry' in the media about them."

Davenport continued: "That being said, I will NOT resign my central committee position over this matter that the average person knows and agrees is much to do about nothing."

Right! No one called it racist when W. was depicted as a Chimp! There's your double standard! How DARE you try to make this harmless joke about RACE!

Still, it's kind of a PR problem - you know, because people keep wrongly accusing the tea party of hating ALL black people when they really only hate the one black person. And not because he's black. No, they hate him because he hasn't lowered taxes, and there's no proof whatsoever that he was born in the United States, and he refuses to compromise on the slightest thing, and he's a Muslim.

And the Muslim thing, THAT'S NOT INTOLERANCE! They're just saying.

Oh, and his black wife. They hate her too. But most of the blacks, they're just fine with. Micheal Steele, for example... okay, him too, but that's because those people can't run things. What? WHAT?

Anyway, because of the PR imbroglio, there have been suggestions that maybe it would be better if Marilyn Davenport wasn't in a leadership position. Sadly, it's easier said than done.

UPDATE, APRIL 17, 3:40 P.M.: Orange County Republican Party Chairman Scott Baugh determined today that his group's bylaws prevent a vote to remove Marilyn Davenport as an elected member even though she emailed a racist image of President Barack Obama to fellow Tea Baggers and Republicans.

The most drastic action the party can take is a censure, he said. Meanwhile, Davenport refuses to resign and Baugh continues to seek an apology and her voluntary resignation from the central committee.

I can see her point - she refuses to admit she's racist, she refuses to relinquish power despite the fact that she represents a tiny sliver of her constituency - she is, in fact the archetype for Tea Baggers.

Those Democrats Finally Shut Up

Daypart Phenomenon

This weekend SNL put out this very effective takedown of Fox And Friends, the Fox News morning show. And while I buy the premise, which is that the hosts are clueless and the show plays to the lowest common denominator, you can't say this is a thing limited to Fox. I am struggling to find evidence of a morning news show on radio or television that isn't pitched at a 5th grade level.

All Things Considered! Okay, that was easier than I thought. Now try to come up with two.

I am aware of the SNL parody because I heard an excerpt of it on the Stephanie Miller Show, which they will freely admit is as stupid as it comes. If you want less biased stupidy in the Los Angeles Area, there's always KTLA (Tribune) or KTTV (Fox) in addition to the networks. But the factor they all have in common is the viewer is assumed to be an idiot. And don't get me started on Morning Zoo radio programs, which strain to find enough offensive material to fill 3 hours five days a week.

What is it about the morning that makes media people assume we'll be unable to take mature evening-news-type news? It's a serious question. I assume that the ratings are high for these shows, so obviously we're all eating it up, but why? Why only the morning?

Quote Of The Day

Well, I don’t know if we’re checkmating. But we’re trying — we’re trying to score a victory for the Republican people, for — for the American — for the Republican people — trying to score a victory for the American people, not for the Republican Party. That victory is going to come in stages here.

-Mike Pence, R-IN, On Greta Van Sustern's show. Fight it Mike! Use your inside voice!

Deregulate Oil, Regulate Miscegenation

Hey, been to Mississippi lately? Not me! I can't afford the gasoline! But people are there, and Public Policy Polling asked the Republicans among them a few questions. First question, not so embarassing:

Mississippi Republicans want Haley Barbour to be their nominee for President next year, and he's doing far better in his home state than most of the other Republicans looking at the race are doing in theirs. 37% say Barbour is their first choice, followed by 19% for Mike Huckabee, 10% for Newt Gingrich and Sarah Palin, 6% for Mitt Romney, 5% for Michele Bachmann, 3% for Tim Pawlenty, and 2% for Ron Paul.

The only Republican we've found doing better in their home state so far is Romney, who 47% of Massachusetts GOP voters want as their nominee.

Okay, that's all kind of predictable. (By the way Romney in Massachusetts? Somebody likes their state-run health care plan!)
But here's the real reason I'm linking to this:

We asked voters on this poll whether they think interracial marriage should be legal or illegal- 46% of Mississippi Republicans said it should be illegal to just 40% who think it should be legal. For the most part there aren't any huge divides in how voters view the candidates or who they support for the nomination based on their attitudes about interracial marriage but there are a few exceptions.

Palin's net favorability with folks who think interracial marriage should be illegal (+55 at 74/19) is 17 points higher than it is with folks who think interracial marriage should be legal (+38 at 64/26.) Meanwhile Romney's favorability numbers see the opposite trend. He's at +23 (53/30) with voters who think interracial marriage should be legal but 19 points worse at +4 (44/40) with those who think it should be illegal. Tells you something about the kinds of folks who like each of those candidates.

I'd be fascinated to see either candidate weigh in on this one! But of course, they're not obligated to and only Sharon Angle would be crazy enough to address the question. Fortunately, she's thinking of running.

My Weirdest Purchase Lately

It's a muscle stimulator! I was in the mall over the weekend and this kiosk guy tried to talk me into buying one for $100 bucks. I thought it was cool but figured I could do better online. And yes, I did. $40, thanks for asking.

If you ever saw the Bruce Lee biopic Dragon, Lee was a devotee of such machines, though at the time they were tabletop-sized and now you can clip them on your belt. You glue electrodes to your skin over muscle groups and then electric shocks are sent to the muscles, forcing them to contract. It's just like that experiment in high school where you jolted a frog's leg and made it jerk around. No they didn't make me do it in my high school but I heard stories.

I'm using it now on my pecs and man, it's strange. My moobs are dancin'! I've also got a couple on my abs, but that's barely registering. Either I don't have them near enough to the muscles or more likely, they layers of fat are keeping the electricity from getting through.

I think probably what this will be really useful for, as far as I'm concerned, is that nagging middle-back pain that I have. A few months ago I was plagued by lower back pain, and I remembered that a cure for that is ab exercises. Sure enough, I stregnthend those muscles with daily sit-ups and the pain hasn't bothered me. Then I had shoulder pain and since I stared doing pushups, I feel great. But I don't know a good middle back (lats, right?) exercise. Besides I'm essentially lazy. I'd rather a 9-volt battery did my exercise for me while I blog. Is that so wrong? Hopefully I can find a gadget online to answer that.

Scott Walker Attempts to Re-Define "Majority"

Gov. Scott Walker said this afternoon that the spring election results show there are "two very different worlds in this state."

"You've got a world driven by Madison, and a world driven by everybody else out across the majority of the rest of the state of Wisconsin," Walker said at a press conference in the Capitol.

Yeah, that's the problem - the people in the big city are bossing around the rest of the state, which is the majority. Just because there are more of one kind of people, doesn't mean they are superior in number to another kind!

By the way, for the record - I Walk With Stander.

Just Because I'm An Atheist, Don't Mean I Don't Like SFX

This is pretty well-produced! I'm thinking of pretending to pray on Cinco De Mayo now, just because I want to control the weather too.

Don't Trust the New York Post

NY Post:

The after-party for "Saturday Night Live" early yesterday morning at Primehouse glittered with host Elton John's colorful friends. "SNL" alum Steve Martin jumped on a banquette to roast the host in song, a spy said. John quickly jumped up to join him in front of guests including John's partner, David Furnish, Lorne Michaels and most of the "SNL" cast.

Steve Martin's Twitter Account:

Lorne, trusting wife and I agree, where were we when this happened? Could it be they MADE THIS UP? Nah.

It's only entertainment coverage. An august journal like the New York Post would surely source all its other news much more thoroughly.

Don't Worry, He's Only A STATE Senator