Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Why The Supreme Court Must Strike Down DOMA


  1. Corporations, per the Citizens United decision, are people.
  2. Corporations are ungendered; therefore, all of them are the same sex.
  3. Same sex unions are expressly forbidden in the Defense Of Marriage act.
  4. Any corporate merger could, therefore, be challenged and defeated.
You could say that SCOTUS could simply leave it up to the states to decide, but that would mean states decide WHICH CORPORATION gets to do business in them. Vonage could challenge ATT and wind up with all of Oregon. Sure it's a specious argument, but that's cold comfort if you're spending 3 years and millions of dollars of legal fees fighting it.

Monday, March 25, 2013

The 'Net Really Does Make Your Life Easier

If you're like me (and you probably are because as far as I can tell, I'm the only person who reads this) you are occasionally enraged by things that Donald Trump says. You wish you could argue with, and insult, him. Also, you might have the same reaction about Michelle (Japanese internment camps were great and totally justified) Malkin. You wish you could take them both down a few pegs but who has the time?

Well good news! They're taking up the slack for you.

Conservative pundit Michelle Malkin says Donald Trump is a “clown” and a “coward.” Trump says Malkin is a “dummy” and was “born stupid.”
The pair engaged in a back-and-forth Twitter war, kicking off with Malkin writing to her followers Thursday night that Trump supports the pro-eminent domain Supreme Court case Kelo v. New London, “cheered socialized medicine, smeared ‘my past’ & called me a dummy. #phony.” She also tweeted, “Still waiting for coward @realDonaldTrump to tell me what in my ‘past’ I should be ashamed of. #SmearMerchant.”
Trump responded on Friday, tweeting to Malkin, “at least dummy is true!” and “you were born stupid!”
If I'm choosing sides I'm on Team Malkin, who has never lost money on an Atlantic City casino or been bested by Merv Griffin in a real estate deal. But really why take sides? I finally found something from both camps that I can agree with.

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Why Yes, It Has Been A While

Ages since I've written, eh? Been busy. Had a birthday, got accepted into a play (I'm a Forest Ranger in  weirdo musical gem Little Mary Sunshine, coming in April to a theatre near me!) and perhaps most importantly, have been ground down by politics again.

It seems like everything I can say about politics is best left to twitter, because the 140 character limit nicely encapsulates "No, YOU'RE wrong."  I'm only half kidding. It's clear that nothing I do will change things, and the electorate is moving back to the middle where the founding fathers wanted it.

Also, this blog ain't bumping up the ol' Klout score, if you know what I mean. Who reads blogs? Ain't nobody, that's who. So if I'm writing here it's not because you are going to read it. Clearly, you will not. I'm writing to keep my thoughts someplace.

This is a version of an entry that I do every six months, and usually within a week I'm back to posting blog entries regular like. So, take heart or be disheartened, depending on how you lean.

Thursday, February 28, 2013

Formerly Known As EXPERIMENT IN TERROR

Bob Woodward. I wrote half a blog here making fun of his dread over the implied threat in this letter from Gene Sperling. But I hear he's no longer claiming to feel threatened. So rather than the torrent of insults I was going to spew out here I think I'll just say this:

I admire Bob Woodward for his work, but I think he's mistaken in his characterization of the Obama administration as the source of most of the gridlock in Washington.

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

How DARE THEY CUT GOVERNMENT SERVICES!

Arizona officials — from the statehouse to Capitol Hill — were outraged on Tuesday at the Obama administration’s release of hundreds of illegal immigrants held in local jails to save money as huge budget cuts loom. 
“I’m appalled to learn the U.S. Department of Homeland Security has begun to release hundreds of illegal aliens from custody, the first of potentially thousands to soon be freed under the guise of federal budget cuts,” said Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer, who has long battled the White House on immigration matters. “This is pure political posturing and the height of absurdity, given that the releases are being granted before the federal sequestration cuts have even gone into effect.”
In Pinal County, about 70 miles north of the U.S.-Mexico border, Sheriff Paul Babeu told Newsmax that the release of hundreds of detainees over the weekend was “outrageous and unacceptable because there’s a direct and immediate impact to public safety of families in my county.”
To recap: Sequestration. A terrible, terrible idea. It was entirely Obama's idea. And now that it's going to happen, it will destroy the country. But it's only a pittance. We need to cut much more than this. And at least Obama has given us a spending cut without a tax hike, because the #obamaquester is entirely his idea.


Monday, February 18, 2013

Flattest Tax Ever! A Modest Proposal

Okay, I think I've finally found a fair system everyone can agree on.

Everybody, no matter what they make, pays $30,000 year in Federal Taxes.

See! No one is is unduly penalized because they make too much money that way! This and my other modest proposal, to completely eliminate the minimum wage, will ensure prosperity and high employment for everyone.

Now obviously, there are going to be some "takers" who refuse to pay. "I don't have a job!" or "I only make $20,000 a year!" they'll claim. Or even "If I pay that much in taxes I won't be about to afford food or shelter!" You even hear that one in response to unfair percentage-based tax proposals, like Cain's 9-9-9 plan. Those people are deadbeats, and they must be dealt with. I'd say imprison them but that's a little pricey. Better to force them to take Government jobs. Let's start with postal workers and teachers! Any job that a union handles now.

Then if those jobs fill up, the Government can contract them out to Monsanto or Haliburton. We can get a bulk rate for them.

Wednesday, February 06, 2013

As Long As Someone Delivers The Milk Daily

This is an issue? Listen I don't know about you, but my mail is largely an odious burden. I resent having to open up the mailbox on Saturdays. Once I do, I'm annoyed that I have to find places to throw it away, have to decide what to shred and what to just toss out. Oh and once in a while there is a bill, but 5 days a week will take care of that just fine.

Monday, February 04, 2013

Antisocial Networking

Will somebody please mole it up and join The Tea Party Community? I'd do it myself but let's face it, I wouldn't last 4 minutes before they saw my online history and threw me out. Then I couldn't repost all the things that they're too afraid to say out loud in the general population, because it gets distorted and makes them look bad.

But you, you can. Join, and funnel the information to me. I promise I will repost without distorting anything.

Thursday, January 24, 2013

I'm In Ur RNC, Killing Ur Dudez

This can't be good.

RNC chairman Reince Priebus (OMG I JUST REALIZED HOW HE GOT THE JOB - HIS FIRST NAME IS HOW YOU PRONOUNCE RNC) has installed the famous "empty chair" from the convention in his office. You know, the one Clint Eastwood shouted at, mistaking it for the president. Priebus claims he's using it as a reminder of the terrible beating Republicans took in the last election. Lying, obviously.

For one thing, Preibus has insisted that the Republicans did just fine in the last election, narrowly losing where they lost at all. But more importantly the thing you have to remember about that chair - Republicans believe it can talk! They believe the chair is Obama!

No doubt the real plan is to interrogate the chair, to find out what it plans to do next and how it plans to steal our guns and bibles. You've made a terrible tactical error, Priebus. The chair will get into your head. You saw what it did to Eastwood - he started out perfectly rational and within 12 minutes he was a rambling, foaming crazy person.

Don't think it could happen to you, eh? What makes you different from @Rosas77? Or the hundreds of others across this great nation of ours? I'm telling you, for your own safety; at the very minimum cover the chair with a sheet or something.

Friday, January 18, 2013

A Dog-Whistle For the Rest Of Us

You are probably familiar with the term "dog-whistle" in politics; it's a talking point that is meant to mean something different to your people than it does to the outsiders. For example when John Sununu calls President Obama "lazy" it doesn't literally mean that - like all presidents, Obama works 14 hours a day and will never rack up as many vacation hours as the previous guy. But the stereotype of African Americans is that they're lazy. It's a reminder that he's black.

Democrats have had a hard time finding our own dog whistle, perhaps because we seem to be acquiring the moderates as well. If most of the country is in on it, how can there even be insiders? But I think I've stumbled on to something. Last night I tweeted this:

piker62Who knew? "The Obama Administration’s number one priority is the destruction of US defensive capability" http://t.co/6AI4PpT6
1/17/13 6:06 PM

I was amused by the idea that a guy would get himself elected president just so he could destroy our nation's defense. I mean, really, come on. But a few minutes later, I got this:

MaryForbes14@piker62 Glenn Beck knew over four years ago. Few listened. They are now. @GlennBeck
1/17/13 6:15 PM 
This was even funnier to me, because someone thought I had taken the idea seriously.
piker62
@MaryForbes14 @glennbeck So he's not trying to instigate sharia law after all?
1/17/13 6:29 PM
MaryForbes14@piker62 @glennbeck It is all part of his agenda. You have to think bigger. He will make it happen fast. We have to be faster to stop him.
1/17/13 6:25 PM 
So far I've had three retweets of my mocking, all by real conservatives. One has even subscribed to me!

This is our dog whistle - just quote these guys straight, at their worst. Let's face it, one of the reason we won so big in the last election was because the candidates did their own talking. "Legitimate Rape" makes its own gravy. And the best part is, the'll be thrilled that we're doing it.

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Also, Just To Ensure The Blacks Vote Democrat...

10:15 am, Friday, Burwell Plantation, Coalitions-Discussion on Successful Comms w/ Minorities & Women.
That's right! For the discussion on ways to more effectively communicate with minorities, they chose one of four conference rooms in the hotel that's called BURWELL PLANTATION. Perhaps the Brown Sugar room wasn't available? 

Democrats Already Winning 2014, 2016

The GOP sure knows how to pick its issues! Sure they almost unanimously voted against sending FEMA money to the NorthEast in the wake of a huge hurricane in a densely populated area. It's not that they're against those people getting their lives back after a devastating storm. They just have priorities.

Similarly, it's not that Bobby Jindahl wants old people to suffer by eliminating hospice care. He wishes they had the funds. But they don't! Because...

...they need them to prevent Gays from marrying!

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Not That HIS Opinion Matters



Strictly speaking Ronald Reagan DID support gun control during his term.

In 1986, [Reagan] signed into law the Firearm Owners Protection Act, which “banned ownership of any fully automatic rifles that were not already registered on the day the law was signed.” He later backed the Brady bill, expressing support for “a seven-day waiting period before a purchaser could take possession of a handgun, an even more stringent restriction than the five day cooling-off period that was included in the final legislation, and less stringent than the 15-day cooling-off period he signed into law as governor of California.”
But maybe, I dunno, he was nuts by then?

Monday, January 14, 2013

Bipartisan Compromise, Hail-Of-Bullets Edition

Here's a petition you can sign!

Eliminate armed guards for the President, Vice-President, and their families, and establish Gun Free Zones around them

Gun Free Zones are supposed to protect our children, and some politicians wish to strip us of our right to keep and bear arms. Those same politicians and their families are currently under the protection of armed Secret Service agents. If Gun Free Zones are sufficient protection for our children, then Gun Free Zones should be good enough for politicians.
Some people won't really go for it though. So here's what I'm thinking: howzabout everywhere is a gun-free zone, unless someone there gets a certain amount of death threats per week, say a dozen. That way it's not hypocritical.

Plus pro tip: if you want your child's school to allow guns, write a bunch of letters THREATENING YOUR CHILD! Then arm the kid and send him on his way. Of course, you're probably home-schooling your child, in which case why are you even bothering with all this?

Wednesday, January 09, 2013

Good Optics, NRA!

What a brilliant idea! After the New York Journal-news published a map of registered gun owners (it's public knowledge in New York, apparently) the NRA has retaliated by posting a list of pro-gun-control businesses and celebrities.

That'll teach those guys a lesson! Let THEM live in fear that someone with an assault rifle will walk in off the street and shoot up the place! Oh, wait...

Friday, December 28, 2012

No Apologies

You know, I'm in a conciliatory mood here at the end of the year. My life is pretty good. I have disagreement with some Republicans about some issues, but by and large people are people. They come by their opinions honestly and are just trying to make America a better place.

So it's true I may have said some things in the last 12 months that may have offended these good people. And as they'd be quick to point out, it's wrong to offend people, especially just for the sake of offending.

On behalf of the whole Democrat party, including our President Barack Hussein Obummerz, I'd like to apologize. We should have compromised and voted for John Boehner's Plan B option in congress.  We shouldn't wage an annual war on Christmas, because America is a Christian Nation. By the way, quit making trouble you Jews!

We're sorry we opposed the election of Mitt Romney for president. That was just wrong, to force our unpopular president on the nation when everybody all loved Mitt Romney so much.

We're sorry we keep bringing up... they guy who was in the White House between Clinton and NobaMMa. Do you know, some DemocRats blame TARP and the auto bailouts and Fast and Furious on that guy?

We apologize for allowing this to happen.


We apologize for making fun of Dick Morris, who is always right.

We apologize for controlling the media. Why don't we step aside and give someone else a chance, huh?

Oh, lunch hour is over. Gotta get back to my job. Ah what the hell... I'll quit and just mooch off the job creators by filing for unemployment and demanding a phone and an Escalade. What's more, I'll insist on getting my social security instead of giving it up. I'm an American! We're America's worst nightmare!

Sorry about that.

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

And You Thought It Was Because He Didn't Have One

Mitt Romney - during the campaign, did it ever seem like his heart really wasn't in the whole being president thing? Well, it probably wasn't.

More than being reticent, Romney was at first far from sold on a second presidential run. Haunted by his 2008 loss, he initially told his family he would not do it. While candidates often try to portray themselves as reluctant, Tagg insisted his father’s stance was genuine. 
“He wanted to be president less than anyone I’ve met in my life. He had no desire to . . . run,” said Tagg, who worked with his mother, Ann, to persuade his father to seek the presidency. “If he could have found someone else to take his place . . . he would have been ecstatic to step aside. He is a very private person who loves his family deeply and wants to be with them, but he has deep faith in God and he loves his country, but he doesn’t love the attention.”
Who else has Tagg Romney met, who was reluctant to run for President? Hmmm.

Anyway, that would explain THAT campaign pretty handily, right?




Friday, December 21, 2012

The First Casualty is Talking Points

In today's speech by Wayne LaPierre the trusted Frenchman proposed that schools be patrolled by armed volunteers, trained by the NRA. It caused a shockwave throughout the conservative community, because they had to weigh this idea against the idea of gun control. The volunteers won.

Why? Because.

A: Airport security is actually effective and has prevented terrorism. You might have thought from reading that a lot of the right regarded the TSA as useless but you were mistaken - a knee-jerk reaction to a single incident is just what the doctor ordered!

B: The New Black Panthers and union thugs aren't dangerous at all! As you can see from this conversation, they're just as likely to be folk who you want to give a rifle to so they can be around your kids all day.

C. Violent rhetoric leads to violence. Remember when I was all, dude, maybe back up on the "tree of liberty" talk and they were all, hey, chill, crazy people be crazy no matter what you say, yo? Turns out they don't believe that at all! It's movies and videogames and rap music that causes these shootings.

So a volunteer national army trained and financed by the NRA is the sensible solution to gun violence, and silencing the media is the only way to protect America's freedom to carry arms. It's guaranteed in the constitution!

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

How Do We Prevent Another Newtown Shooting?

Well, let's start with the obvious: Glenn Beck tweeted:


Giving kids pretend iPhone cases OBVIOUSLY leads to school shootings by adults.

Mike Huckabee, on the other hand, is sure those kids were shot because God isn't allowed in schools. That's logical! Either God has no power in places where prayer isn't allowed (I wonder how he got along before language?) or even worse, GOD KILLED THOSE KIDS because he wanted to call attention to the lack of prayer. No wonder it's called "God-fearing"! I'm an atheist and right now, I'm scared s***less.



Neither of these things seems to DIRECTLY address the problem. Some of my crazy far-left lunatics are saying if there were less guns available for sale, there would be less shootings. HA! More sensible heads are prevailing; the solution is to arm the teachers duh. The violent union thug teachers must carry semi-automatics themselves. Of course, no one wants to talk about who's paying for the guns, ammo and training. NOT MY TAX DOLLARS, THAT'S FOR SURE. Let 'em buy that stuff themselves, like they do pencils and books.

Monday, December 17, 2012

Requesting Guidance From The Right

Are any of the tweets listed in this Wonkette post racist? Because you know, we liberals see racism in everything.

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Politics Is Uninteresting Because It's All Over Next Week Anyway

These people with their fiscal cliff talks and plans for the coming year - come on now! Anybody who is paying attention knows that 9 days from now, the world ends! It ends before the current misbegotten session of Congress does! No matter what you're up to, the catch phrase that covers it: THERE AIN'T NO FUTURE IN THAT.

With that in mind, I just bought a refrigerator on credit. It delivers to my place on the 19th, and the first payment is due (haha) next month, as if there were such a thing. For two glorious days I can enjoy perfectly chilled food and significant energy savings, and then bang, aloha, I don't have to worry about it any more.

Actually it is kinda interesting to watch politics. The Republicans are arguing that they must be allowed to completely rewrite 50 years of law by the end of the year or they will take us over a fiscal cliff. Tall order, Republicans! You're bluffing of course. You'll probably say you just started on the 18th and were totally planning to be finished by December 30th.

I should talk. I promised to visit my Mom on Christmas.

Thursday, December 06, 2012

III Citadel - Everybody Wins!

Since the election there has been a lot of talk about this state or that state seceding from the United States, almost as if they didn't want to have a black guy as their boss. (I know what you're going to say, but you didn't hear that when Clinton or Carter was president) Anyway, there was this unfortunate Supreme Court decision after the civil war which kind of made that impossible. But there must be a solution! Where can people who love America but can't stand the lazy, president-loving Americans who live in it go? Hopefully, here!

The cornerstone of the Citadel is III Arms Company, an industry to support the first wave of Patriots who will become modern American Pioneers. We will build Fighting Arms and ammunition for Patriots and around us a town will begin to grow. Other revenue streams are already in the works. Our intent is to purchase at least one thousand acres, and construct a walled town of at least one square mile to withstand any potential violence from hungry, diseased Souls. Obviously the Citadel is not being built to defy any laws of the United States or the State of Idaho, or to withstand any .gov or .mil attack. Our fortifications are merely defensive for a SHTF world. 
The Citadel will have between 3,500 and 5,000 households within the walls, with a single gate permitting access. The Citadel is not to be a closed society, instead a refuge for genuine Patriots who wish to live without neighbors who are Liberals and Establishment political ideologues, open for tourists who will be welcomed into our town to visit our planned Firearms Museum, shop in our Town Center, stay in a B&B or hotel while vacationing and exploring the wonderful skiing, hunting and fishing opportunities in the area, and many other attractions we will offer.
It's like a gated community, only with more weapons. And apparently geared towards defense against government run websites like .gov or .mil.

Look, I think it's a great idea. We can't stop these people from voting but at least we can keep them in a box right? Throw some money at them. Let's make it happen.

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Finally, The Rice Controversy Boiled Down

"McCain, Graham, and Ayotte immediately told reporters that the real scandal here is that when Rice went on TV, she said a thing that turned out not to be true, simply because the CIA had told her that thing, and instead of simply saying “we don’t know,” she said that they thought maybe it was one thing, but they were still looking into it. How dare she mislead the American people like that!
No, really, that is the actual controversy, as near as we can figure out."
- Wonkette 

Quote of the Day: My Condition Is Deteriorating Edition

“I am more disturbed now than before,” said South Carolina Sen. Lindsey Graham.

Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2012/11/26/rice-to-meet-with-top-gop-senators-after-their-objections-to-her-replacing/#ixzz2DSIrFS3f

Monday, November 26, 2012

S'no Big Deal

I just spent the 4 day weekend almost completely off the internet, opting instead of a Ski Condo close to Mammoth Mountain in California. I do not ski, but I hike and that seems to be enough.Once in a while I had to open up the Maps app to find Hot Creek or to settle an argument over which Bond movie had the exploding pen. But for the most part it was the least digital 4 days I've spent in a long time. Also avoided - news. So if anything had happened (it looks like nothing did) I'd have missed it.

Anyway, hiking in reduced oxygen environments is surprisingly pleasant, and I recommend it to you.

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Oh Fox News, You Scamp

So I was just poking around Fox News and look at this! It's an urgent story about the jobless claims! Goodness, it looks like good news for the economy! That's very even-handed of them, considering that some there say that Obama is bad for the economy! 
So I clicked on it. Turns out to be a story about government malfeasance that has nothing to do with jobless claims. Bait 'n' switch? Incompetent coding? Matter of opinion? I report. You decide. By the way, check out this caption:

Twofer!

Monday, November 19, 2012

Black Friday Gift Idea for the Hostess Executives

Everybody knows that the failure of Hostess Foods resulted from the baker's union strike. The execs at Hostess must be very depressed this holiday season, having done everything they can to keep the company afloat.  In fact, they were doing so well that they tripled their salaries over the last ten years! Pretty good considering they had to declare bankruptcy twice.

Those mean bakers should do the honorable thing and chip in to get the executives a gift. Considering that it's hard to buy a gift for the guy who has everything (I bet literally in this case) they'll probably have to do a little digging. Let's start here.


A chorus of cheers rings out the minute you pull up. Tailgating will never be the same now that your Bulleit Frontier Whiskey Woody-Tailgate Trailer is on the scene. Designed by interior designer Brad Ford, it's impressive on the outside, but what's on the inside truly astounds: sleek leather furnishings and details from Moore & Giles, rich wood finishings (handcrafted from reclaimed Bulleit Bourbon casks), elegant glassware, and a top-notch entertainment system, including a flat-screen TV, Blu-ray Disc™ player, and a state-of-the-art sound system, plus a one-year supply of Bulleit Bourbon and Bulleit Rye*. You park, open the hatch, and slide out the bar—cocktails anyone?

The details:
  • Two limited-edition trailers available. (First available for immediate delivery; second available within six months of placing order.)
  • Transportation and delivery of trailer is included within the continental United States.
  • Created by designer Brad Ford, who has more than 10 years of experience in interior design and was named one of America's Top Young Designers by House Beautiful and recognized as one of the Rising Stars of Interior Design by the International Furnishings and Design Association.
  • Moore & Giles, founded in 1933 in Lynchburg, Virginia, is dedicated to designing and developing the most luxurious natural leathers, working with tanneries worldwide and delivering unparalleled quality.
  • Entertainment system by Sony® and includes: TV, sound-bar speakers, receiver with touch screen, and smartphone controls.
Come on, it's only $150k! More if you get a car to haul it around.And that's per executive of course - you don't expect them to share do you? Come on bakers! 

Friday, November 16, 2012

Insist on Cooks Who Can't See Doctors!

Olive Garden - when you're here, you're like family. A family with untreated tuberculosis!

NEW YORK (AP) - The owner of Olive Garden and Red Lobster restaurants is putting more workers on part-time status in a test aimed at limiting costs from President Barack Obama's health care law.
Darden Restaurants Inc. declined to give details but said the test is only in four markets across the country.
The move entails boosting the number of workers on part-time status, meaning they work less than 30 hours a week.
Under the new health care law, companies with 50 or more workers could be hit with fines if they do not provide basic coverage for full-time workers and their dependents.
Starting Jan. 1, 2014, those penalties and requirements could significantly boost labor costs for some companies, particularly in low-wage industries such as retail and hospitality, where most jobs don't come with health benefits.
Consider the implications of this, lobster/olive oil eaters. The first thing you should know is that THEY WOULD LOSE MONEY IF THEY PROVIDED THEIR EMPLOYEES WITH HEALTH CARE. Which means that if you go to any location today, there is a probability that one of the employees, who cannot afford to miss any hours, is carrying typhoid.

The second thing is soon those employees will have even less hours, and will probably have to turn to prostitution to make ends meet. Do you want a typhus-ridden hooker serving your crab cakes? For God's sake, eat somewhere else!

Maybe not Applebee's, by the way.

Thursday, November 15, 2012

"Is A Republican Civil War Looming?"

Headline via FoxNews. The answer seems to be, "no, as long as the moderates stop fighting." Okie dokie. I'm fine with that too.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Loyalty Above All

I say a lot of bad things about Republicans but I have to admit, they are loyal to each other. When the rest of the world was saying "Donald Rumsfeld is some kind of idiot!" and Rumsfeld himself offered to  resign, Bush wouldn't let him. When Michael Steele was making a particular mess of the RNC, did they fire him immediately? No they waited a long, long time. Even when Tom DeLay was facing expulsion from the house for ethics violations, their first move was to float a bill changing the house rules to allow him to stay. Couldn't quite get that one to fly, but they took a stab at it.

Which is why Broward County Supervisor Of Elections Dr. Brenda Snipes has nothing to worry about. Even though it's about two weeks after the election and they just found over 900 ballots, uncounted, in a warehouse.
Snipes said there is no reason for alarm. "I've run several elections here, and this election was run no different than any other," she said. "I think the difference with this election is that there was a close race between the two presidential candidates, and there was pressure put on everyone, including our office, to get all of the votes, count, count, count, so you don't have an opportunity to check every box that comes back because you got to get what you got in hand and get it out of there, so if the voters would rather that we kind of sit back and relax and then clean up and find ballots. Then I think they would really be very upset." 
She said that further complicating this election was a very long ballot filled with proposed amendments. Snipes has promised that her department will meet their deadline by Sunday.
Come on, you heard the lady. It was a close presidential race. How could anyone in Florida conceive a thing like THAT happening? It's like the very long lines at the ballot. Who'd have thought people might VOTE in this thing?

Anyway, look forward to the interviews in 2016. Snipes will be great then.

Monday, November 12, 2012

It's Important That They Know What They Did Wrong

Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus following the results of Election Day ordered a "full analysis" of what happened during the 2012 election cycle, group spokesman Sean Spicer told Fox News on Saturday. 
Spicer said Republicans did something things well including fundraising, researching, videos implementation and executing a good ground game. But the review will look at changes needed to be made regarding mechanics and messaging.
Priebus is just trying to protect his job. The real problem is not with the RNC, it's with THE AMERICAN PEOPLE. The American people were simply too stupid and too lazy to vote for Mitt Romney.

Republicans need to keep telling them that, every chance they get.

Friday, November 09, 2012

All Talk, No Action



Maybe if they'd stop backing down, and start DOUBLING DOWN, they'd win all the elections. AMIRIGHT?

Why They Lost

After his speech, Mr. Obama tried to call both Mr. Boehner and the Senate Republican leader, Mitch McConnell, but was told they were asleep.
See, these guys care so little about their jobs that they couldn't be bothered to stay awake on Election Night. I'm not an elected official but if George Bush had called ME in 2004, I'd have picked up.

Quote Of The Day: Bitter Facebook Aftermath Edition

The liberals don't believe that Phil the only way to educate even a few if then is to SHOW them. If we keep bailing Obama out these morons will keep voting for him and others like him. So all they have to do is run ads telling the people all the free shit they are gonna get to get elected.
-James J. Spicer, commenting here. I promised him that I won't vote for Obama any more. And no, I'm not entirely sure what the rest of it even means. Who is Phil?

Thursday, November 08, 2012

Treading On Them

A couple of days ago, the right managed to lose the presidency AND a couple of seats in the senate, which is a big deal considering how bad the economy is. As the dust clears, it's human nature to tweak the formula and figure out how to do better next time.

Well the bigger you think the problem is, the bigger your solution. The folks (and they are Folks over there) at Tea Party Nation thinks the election was A Disaster Of Unimaginable Magnitude. Therefore, the solution must be correspondingly severe.

There are some lessons to be learned from this disaster. The first lesson is, no more moderate Republican candidates. Mitt Romney now joins the long list of moderate Republicans who line up right next to General George Custer. Romney lost. McCain lost, George W. Bush barely won and set the stage for Obama. Bob Dole lost. The only reason George H.W. Bush won a single term was because he was Ronald Reagan’s Vice President. When he ran on his own as a moderate, he gave us Bill Clinton.
We conservatives have to say this time; we will not support a moderate again. Our desire to remove Barack Obama and the Party of Treason was so strong that we jumped on board the Romney train. The Republican establishment correctly assumed that if it could get Romney nominated, we would have no choice but to fall in line.
It happened this time. It will not happen again.
Our message to the Republicans should be very clear. If you nominate a moderate in 2016, you will be on your own as conservatives will leave the party, assuming we are there in the party in 2015.

I'm with them on this, and I'll add that it's inevitable. The Tea Party and Republicans were never the same thing, and trying to make them the same is doing neither any favors.  Sure it will split the vote, but the vote is already split. Better to make it official. Better to make it honest.
We have two choices. We can surrender and allow the Party of Treason to continue to destroy liberty in this nation or we can stand and fight

I will only speak for myself. I was born a free American and I shall stay a free American. I will not let this land go into the dark night of tyranny. I will not stand by and watch the lamp of liberty be extinguished.
As far as TPN is concerned, Republicans are the Party of Treason. Democrats, presumably, are the Great Satan. Let them go!

Wednesday, November 07, 2012

Hamlet Was Right

So I'm listening to Rush Limbaugh this morning (yes, for schaudenfreude) and he is completely mystified that Obama could have won both the electoral college AND the popular vote, after that disastrous first term. And I realized that it's exactly the way I felt in 2004. Mitt Romney is their John Kerry - an unappealing rich weirdo who you nominate when you think you can run ANYBODY and the results are still in the bag because the other candidate is so awful.

Turns out, not so much.

As Hamlet said, "there are more things in heaven and Earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy". Such things include independent voters, people who were neither thrilled nor disgusted by either candidate. Strange as it seems, THESE PEOPLE EXIST. I know, weird right? Anyway, there were enough of them to overcome the hoards of people who had made up their minds LAST year about which guy to vote for.

It's important to note that the victory is pretty narrow here. We shouldn't consider it a mandate. What a sensible person will see from this is everybody should compromise and listen to each other's ideas.

I'm sorry this post wasn't more snarky... check out twitter and facebook feeds for that. I'm exhausted from snarky.

Friday, October 26, 2012

It Looks Like I Owe The Birthers An Apology

There is footage of Obama being born in Kenya!



Wow, that kid was huge! Oh wait, the guys addresses that.

Babies are born heavy all the time; I see no issue with that. And I assure you, most of the general public has no idea how big infants are in Kenya.
What?

You might think the US is a fat society, but in Kenya they are born big and then they become light. Which is evidenced by the fact that today, Obama is really light and fit. That’s just the way it is.
That's just the way it is, okay? Stop arguing and FACE THE TRUTH SHEEPLE.


Thursday, October 25, 2012

Quote of the Day: Yeah! Wait NO! Edition

Ginny Lewis, a Democrat and 72-year-old retired district attorney from Princeton, Ky., says she'll vote for Romney because "I'm tired of the Republicans blaming all the debt on Democrats, so let them take over and see what they do."

Free Speech DEMANDS That We Execute Journalists

So says Eric Rush of World Net Daily!

(cutting and pasting is tricky with this one, so you'll have to read the whole thing. But to summarize: "When Romney takes office in January, we must try and execute most of the journalists in this country for treason." Honest!)

First they defend Mubarek and Osama Bin Laden, now they advocate the killing of reporters. Patterns here? Hands?

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Donald Trump, Apologist For 99% of America's Red Meat



Sorry, what? Trump is up to something else today also?



I wouldn't presume to tell the President what to do, though if it were me I'd make a counter-offer: I'd release the transcripts and give a half-mil to Trumps favorite charity (Hair Club For Men?) if Romney releases 10 more years of tax returns. Then, EVERYBODY would be happy.

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

I Can't Get Behind This: Free Weed For Votes

Pot Prizes May Have Lured More Eagle Rock Residents To Vote « CBS Los Angeles

Don't get me wrong, I'm for more people voting. And I think offering a little somethin' somethin', like money off Starbucks, is a nice civic gesture. AS LONG AS YOU'RE NOT RUNNING AS THE PRO-STARBUCKS candidate.

Quote of the Day: Romney Is No Taft Edition

“Governor Romney came in here tonight and showed he was presidential,” Florida Sen. Marco Rubio said after the debate. “The president was small. … Only Mitt Romney spoke and acted like a president.”


Monday, October 22, 2012

Could You Narrow That Frame A Little Please?

Warner Todd Huston pointed this story out to me.

When Richard Nottage of Kingley agreed to help out his ex-wife after she broke her leg, he had no idea that doing so made him a dues-paying member of a union.

"My ex-wife needed help and asked if I could help her," he said. "She'd called adult services, which did an interview and said she qualified for assistance. I helped her out for a couple of months and received one check that covered two pay periods (from May 16 to June 30). When I looked at the check I noticed it had union dues taken out of it. All I did was help out my ex-wife a few weeks and suddenly I was in a union."

Nottage said he had no idea how that happened.

"It was a surprise," Nottage said. "I didn't want to be in a union. I couldn't believe it. I couldn't figure out how this union was tied to the state. It seems pretty unfair. What did I get from the union? What could I get from the union? Nothing."
Warner is now in the position of defending a union thug, no less corrupt and savage than the teachers and firemen he has denigrated in the past. Plus, Nottage is a guy who was requesting money from the government with no strings attached because he was too much of a freeloader to provide for his wife's health. And all of the sudden, he's a victim?

Warner also pointed out to me in twitter that the money wasn't for free health care.
Which to me says, he was bothered that the government WASN'T FORCING HIM TO USE THE MONEY IN A PARTICULAR WAY. I'd have thought he'd be for that.

I have no quarrel with Mr. Nottage, who to me is a guy who found himself in a tight spot and made use of a program to help him out. What bothers me is now, I don't know what the Tea Party stands for. Maybe Mitt Romney is their dream candidate after all!

Thursday, October 18, 2012

The Future Of Politics

Disappointed that the Presidential debate a couple of days ago wasn't rancorous enough? Well, national politics is always behind the curve. Check back in a few years when guys like this make it through the primaries.
The highlight came about halfway through the debate when Fields accused Ellison of spending money to research Fields personal life. Earlier this month, City Pages reported on a restraining order Fields' ex-wife filed against him back in 2006, though it's unclear who paid for the research that dug up the court filing. Ellison, who accused Fields of lying repeatedly throughout the debate, took particular umbrage with the you-spent-money-to-get-dirt-on-me accusation and went into meltdown mode. 
"You're really stupid for bringing up the domestic violence," Ellison said. "You're a scumbag. You're a lowlife scumbag."
Also notable, our own local battle between Democrats Berman and Sherman.

The good news is, I see politics returning to civility (relative civility, obviously) in about a decade. The bad news is, it will be about one year after this current trend peaks. And by then, it will be Whigs versus Tories because we'll be through with this bunch.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

It Must Be Loud In The Fox News Offices!


If you missed the debate last night, you will want to turn to transcripts to find out what was said. The snarky folk at Wonkette noticed last night that Fox News had an unfortunate audio gap (click on the above pictures to see it more fully) which was pretty lengthy! It was about a minute and a half of audio which couldn't be transcribed.

The good news is that every other news organization in the country managed to get the response down. It went like this:

We, of course, don’t want to have automatic weapons, and that’s already illegal in this country to have automatic weapons. What I believe is we have to do, as the president mentioned towards the end of his remarks there, which is to make enormous efforts to enforce the gun laws that we have, and to change the culture of violence that we have.
And you ask how — how are we going to do that? And there are a number of things. He mentioned good schools. I totally agree. We were able to drive our schools to be number one in the nation in my state. And I believe if we do a better job in education, we’ll — we’ll give people the — the hope and opportunity they deserve and perhaps less violence from that. But let me mention another thing. And that is parents. We need moms and dads, helping to raise kids. Wherever possible the — the benefit of having two parents in the home, and that’s not always possible. A lot of great single moms, single dads. But gosh to tell our kids that before they have babies, they ought to think about getting married to someone, that’s a great idea.
Thank heavens! I mean maybe someone was cleaning their AK-47 in the newsroom and it went off. In any event, good thing for Fox News that they're not the only network! Sometimes you need the biased totally-in-the-tank-for-Obama ones to take up the slack.

Hey by the way, Mitt Romney is for gun control! Who knew, right?

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Quote Of The Day: Stop Me Before I Vote Again Edition

Our country might have been better off if it was still just men voting. There is nothing worse than a bunch of mean, hateful women. They are diabolical in how than can skewer a person. I do not see that in men. The whole time I worked, I'd much rather have a male boss than a female boss. Double-minded, you never can trust them.
Janis Lane, president of the Central Mississippi Tea Party

Monday, October 15, 2012

Finally, A Way To Make The Empty Chair Racist



MORGAN HILL, Calif. — Some residents are calling a symbolic political display erected by a Morgan Hill homeowner that features two watermelons and a noose racist and even vaguely threatening towards President Obama.
The apparent reference to President Obama made some people passing by, including Republicans, uneasy.
"We shouldn't be threatening with a noose and a watermelon," said San Martin resident Ben Gomez. "I believe that's a little over the top. I like the chair and the teleprompter. I mean, they're just copying Clint Eastwood, so I can't blame them on that one. But the noose goes a little over the edge."
Listen Señor Gomez, you're either with us or against us. Why don't you drop the chalupa and go back to Spainland with your 30 relatives?

Look, it's not like people aren't joking about lynching Mitt Romney. I mean, somewhere they must be.

Job Advice

Look, I'm not going to tell you how to vote, but I'll tell you this - if your boss is going to use the results of the coming elections as an excuse to lay you off, you might as well quit and look for a better boss.

Wait until after the election, of course. If it goes the way I think it will, then your days there are numbered.

Friday, October 12, 2012

Opera Windows

In the film releasing world, "window" is a term describing the amount of time between when a movie is released in theatres and when it comes out in ancillary markets. For example, The Social Network had about a six month window before it came out on DVD and Blu-Ray, and maybe another 2 months before it was streaming for free on Netflix.

The Social Network was, of course, a huge hit and usually the studios will keep that window big on hits, to maximize their profits. As long as you keep buying tickets, they're going to keep it in the theatres.

Which brings us to this press release article on Newsmax.

A blockbuster documentary film that broke box-office records and exposed President Obama’s past is set for release as a DVD on the eve of the presidential elections.

“2016: Obama’s America” rose quickly in ticket sales to become one the most successful documentaries ever released to theaters, will now have a major second act on Oct 16.

That’s when 2016 will be released as a DVD.
At this writing 2016 is #29 on the national box office charts, but it's only been out for 13 weeks. It's made $33 million dollars (I'm not sure which records have been broken; it's neither documentaries nor political documentaries) but it's safe to say that the people behind the movie are convinced that they're out of juice at the box office. Perhaps they're counting the $300 million dollars they'll make on video? Maybe they'll make another movie depicting the flood of viewers coming to see the first one, and call it an "re-enactment".

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Your Liberal Media

And those liberals almost got away with it!



We have a number of corrections tonight for a story in our 5 o’clock news. The story focused on three new ads from Senator Claire McCaskill aimed at opponent todd akin’s remarks about rape. We incorrectly said there was one ad. We mistakenly said the ads featured two women speaking out against McCaskill. The ads actually feature three women – all survivors of sexual assault – and they were speaking on behalf of McCaskill. Also, a reading error lead to a misquote of one of the women in the ad, who actually said “I’m a pro-life mother and a survivor of an extremely violent sexual assault. As a woman of faith, I must forgive Todd Akin. But as a voter, it’s not something I can forget.” And finally, the McCaskill camp objected to our use of the phrase “controversial characters” when refering to the women in the ads. We apoloigize for that characterization and the errors.

Thursday, October 04, 2012

I Would Have Been Disappointed By The Debate Too

Sure I think about politics all the time, but that doesn't mean I watch the debates. Actually I would have only I had a better thing to do last night - the Cinerama Dome was hosting a screening of It's A Mad Mad Mad Mad World in its original insanely wide aspect ratio. It was on a screen so curved that it seemed to take place on the surface of Venus.

Still from what I'm hearing that Mitt Romney fellah did much, much better than that Barack Obama fellah. Not just Breitbart is saying this. The Stephanie Miller program (my morning show of choice) put forth that view. Every MSM outlet I have encountered today said it. What good is having the entire media in the tank for you if you can't get them to fudge the results of a debate? I'm telling you, when the Jews were running the media it was a lot more on message.

It's way to early to tell if there is a "debate bounce" in the offing for Romney, but will anyone really be convinced that the campaign performance of the last six months was the aberration and last night was the real Romney? In fact, is anyone convinced there IS a real Romney?

Well whatever, I'm moved to say this November may the best man win. If it turns out to be the man both sides hate, if he's the best one then let's make it work people.

Tuesday, October 02, 2012

Don't Be Afraid Little One



What's this country coming to where a guy can't admit that he prefers Judge Scalia while campaigning in a centrist state? The voters tried to CENSOR Scott Brown and it had a chilling effect on his free speech rights!


Monday, October 01, 2012

Reasoned Debate

I think this one falls in into the category of "argument with an empty chair".